Can't Sleep

[Duxwing]

Dear Forum,

Blankie and teddy in hand, I've come here to ask for help. I'm tormented by despairing thoughts whenever I try to sleep; in a sense, my Ti kicks into hyperdrive and analyzes my day, my life, my values, and the entire universe as I know it in the brief span between snuggling in and drifting away. Among the terrors are:

--As the length of my life approaches infinity, the probability of my death approaches one
--The Universe will eventually succumb to a Big Rip, Big Crunch, or Heat Death, taking everyone and everything with it.
--The First Law of Thermodynamics: the entropy of the Universe tends toward a maximum. I feel a weight of entropy whenever I see things being burned, food being eaten, or even realize that my life itself will bring much disorder.
--Dying is just like falling asleep: you'll never even know that you've died
--I might not wake up again
--There is, of course, no "other side," which makes death the end of existence--a total and complete obliteration of my consciousness, and the passage of time will soon erase all but the disorder that I brought.
--My position as a tiny, reproducing speck in a vast and unfeeling void whose works, no matter how great, will be destroyed when the Andromeda Galaxy rips through the Milky Way
--The Edge of Grandeur, the scale factor at which the Universe becomes isotropic (looks the same in all direction) make me feel even more arbitrary, pointless, and alone, like a dot lost on a Cartesian plane with no origin and no axes. The horror! The pure geometric horror!

My dad is too sleepy, my mom won't hug me, so I ask you, the forum, for some help in banishing my demons. I already have my bottle, diaper, and binky, so don't worry about that.

Any help, please?

-Duxwing

 

[Puffy]

 

[Duxwing]

I don't think it's working.

-Duxwing

 

[nexion]

Dear Forum,

Blankie and teddy in hand, I've come here to ask for help. I'm tormented by despairing thoughts whenever I try to sleep; in a sense, my Ti kicks into hyperdrive and analyzes my day, my life, my values, and the entire universe as I know it in the brief span between snuggling in and drifting away. Among the terrors are:

--As the length of my life approaches infinity, the probability of my death approaches one
--The Universe will eventually succumb to a Big Rip, Big Crunch, or Heat Death, taking everyone and everything with it.
--The First Law of Thermodynamics: the entropy of the Universe tends toward a maximum. I feel a weight of entropy whenever I see things being burned, food being eaten, or even realize that my life itself will bring much disorder.
--Dying is just like falling asleep: you'll never even know that you've died
--I might not wake up again
--There is, of course, no "other side," which makes death the end of existence--a total and complete obliteration of my consciousness, and the passage of time will soon erase all but the disorder that I brought.
--My position as a tiny, reproducing speck in a vast and unfeeling void whose works, no matter how great, will be destroyed when the Andromeda Galaxy rips through the Milky Way
--The Edge of Grandeur, the scale factor at which the Universe becomes isotropic (looks the same in all direction) make me feel even more arbitrary, pointless, and alone, like a dot lost on a Cartesian plane with no origin and no axes. The horror! The pure geometric horror!

My dad is too sleepy, my mom won't hug me, so I ask you, the forum, for some help in banishing my demons. I already have my bottle, diaper, and binky, so don't worry about that.

Any help, please?

-Duxwing

I really would like to help but I'm afraid that there isn't really a way to. I suppose that any rational thinking person who doesn't believe in a higher power or a higher purpose will come to realizations like the ones you have outlined here.

I came into the knowledge of a few of these facts in a rudimentary way when I was in the mid-teens, and my solution was to destroy everything and start over (I'll let you know how that worked out when it actually does work out). What I did after destroying everything was begin to rebuild my beliefs using these facts as the chief axioms.Ideas such as these rarely keep me up at night anymore because these ideas are essentially the basis of everything I believe now. They are merely facts for me. I'd say the state of nihility existence will likely always be as a result of doing this is highly undesirable to people who don't already have a predisposition towards such ideas.

There really isn't much others can do for you. Either you live with it long enough that you become desensitized to it, you find some way to make these questions become meaningless (take the existentialist's route), or you do what I did. There may be other ways, too, but I am not privy to this information. If you cannot do any of those, then I'm afraid that there is not really much you can do to help yourself either.

I wish you the best, at any rate.

 

[Architect]

You're worrying about the wrong thing. You don't want infinite life, you want a long enough life. 100 years? 200? Or a thousand? Surely the I Love Lucy reruns will begin to tire by then. And if they don't you have other problems.

 

[Proletar]

@Duxwing:

I've had problems sleeping for as long as I can remember.

The problem is not that you are thinking about death and existance. The problem is that you are thinking. Your brain is understimulated. I would advise you to jump straight into some project that you find interesting and devoting yourself to it. That should keep those demons away.

 

[Architect]

@Duxwing:

I've had problems sleeping for as long as I can remember.

The problem is not that you are thinking about death and existance. The problem is that you are thinking. Your brain is understimulated. I would advise you to jump straight into some project that you find interesting and devoting yourself to it. That should keep those demons away.

Agree.

I'd give this as general advice. Bored? Disillusioned? Depressed? You need to get some exercise and get involved in a project.

 

[Absurdity]

Jesus, man up.

Seriously, how old are you? You want your mom to hug you so you'll feel better?

Read some Seneca and grow a pair.

 

[BigApplePi]

--As the length of my life approaches infinity, the probability of my death approaches one

--The Universe will eventually succumb to a Big Rip, Big Crunch, or Heat Death, taking everyone and everything with it.

--Dying is just like falling asleep: you'll never even know that you've died
--I might not wake up again

--There is, of course, no "other side," which makes death the end of existence--a total and complete obliteration of my consciousness, and the passage of time will soon erase all but the disorder that I brought.

--My position as a tiny, reproducing speck in a vast and unfeeling void whose works, no matter how great, will be destroyed when the Andromeda Galaxy rips through the Milky Way

Any help, please?

-Duxwing

Sure. Glad to help. I admit these are problems ... especially when the Andromeda Galaxy gets too close.

The problem is solved when someone loves you. That's all you need. That love could appear out of nowhere anytime. Wait for it and let it wash over you. It will come. You've posted here a while and I see that for you. When it does come, don't mishandle it. Appreciate it.

 

[Etheri]

... I find that the problem of insomnia somewhat solves itself.

Worst case scenario, you skip a nights sleep but sleep like a baby the next few days.

Truth be told I have trouble sleeping whenever i'm not high / stoned, so i'll still get high almost daily
I don't think you can directly stop insomnia, nor that it's all because of your thoughts / overthinking.

 

[Hadoblado]

The thoughts are a pretty massive deal. When I've had insomnia, and pretty much time I've ever had difficulty sleeping, it has been in combination with excitatory thoughts. Whether it be a heated discussion with complex logic involved, or the presentation of a previously unavailable opportunity, thoughts are the only thing that have ever been able to keep me awake (other than caffeine overdose )

I find it help to think as if you were a base animal. Think simple thoughts. How warm are you? How comfortable is your bed? What will you have for breakfast? How good was dinner? How could it be improved. If you can keep thinking about this vaccuous shit, you will be asleep within half an hour every time.

I never got the hang of meditation, but it sounds a lot better than my method...

 

[walfin]

Are you able to procure some alcohol?

Anyway, alcohol in moderation is fine. No barbiturates please.

 

[Duxwing]

Jesus, man up.

Seriously, how old are you? You want your mom to hug you so you'll feel better?

Read some Seneca and grow a pair.

It's a joke, Absurdity. I was trying to make a joke about how I looked coming here. Didn't you notice the references to teddy bears and pacifiers?

-Duxwing

 

[Hawkeye]

The chances of Earth being destroyed by Andromeda are as likely as you getting run down on a motorway (freeway... whatever) when the surrounding vehicles are 2 miles away.

 

[Duxwing]

You're worrying about the wrong thing. You don't want infinite life, you want a long enough life. 100 years? 200? Or a thousand? Surely the I Love Lucy reruns will begin to tire by then. And if they don't you have other problems.

To analogize life to watching I Love Lucy is to imply that life exists to be watched—that it is a spectacle to observe and become bored with. And perhaps you are right. But could the answer to becoming bored of I Love Lucy re-runs be to write your own? To, in the words of Sharkboy and Lavagirl, “Dream a bigger dream”? I’ve been grappling with the idea recently and concluded that the solution to an infinite lifespan is the same as your solution to boredom and depression (indeed, the complaint that you’ve raised is essentially that infinite life causes these two problems): getting exercise and doing projects. Hence, I'd want to live forever, but alas, I cannot.
Anything that I've missed?
-Duxwing

 

[Duxwing]

The thoughts are a pretty massive deal. When I've had insomnia, and pretty much time I've ever had difficulty sleeping, it has been in combination with excitatory thoughts. Whether it be a heated discussion with complex logic involved, or the presentation of a previously unavailable opportunity, thoughts are the only thing that have ever been able to keep me awake (other than caffeine overdose )

I find it help to think as if you were a base animal. Think simple thoughts. How warm are you? How comfortable is your bed? What will you have for breakfast? How good was dinner? How could it be improved. If you can keep thinking about this vaccuous shit, you will be asleep within half an hour every time.

I never got the hang of meditation, but it sounds a lot better than my method...

I remember doing that as a kid. I'd pretend that I was out in a trench, oddly enough, hunkering down behind a piece of cover as bullets lazily whizzed overhead. I'd be asleep in minutes.

-Duxwing

 

[GodOfOrder]

If death leads to nothingness, I can not comprehend why this should disturb us, it means only that we shall lack the capacity to be disturbed. Therefore it doesn't matter and caring is pointless. If one makes this resignation, there is nothing to mourn or worry over because everything was nothing to begin with.

Sleep soundly and hug your teddybear

 

[Lot]

I think any slightly thoughtful adult has been there. I know it's too late for last night, but it'll happen again until you resolve these thoughts. I was that way since I was 10 or so. It dropped off in my early teens and picked beck up when I first moved out of my parent's.

Projects to distract you work well if you don't think you have time or the will power to tackle the issue at the moment. Try to find where you fit in this world. That will take a load off your mind. When you know your place all those problems seem to resolve them selves. In so far as you either stop caring, or you stop worrying.

You might have a form of ruminations. I personally suffer from post event ruminations. When not trying to sleep and in a good mind, think about the events that led up to your sleep. Think about what thoughts got you to worry about those things. That's the rest of my advice. But if you believe in some greater being in or outside the universe, that gives wisdom or shows love, perhaps you give them a call.

Oops, final words. Video games work wonders to make the time past and get you to forget about stuff. Hell you might even make it till the sun rises. There is something comforting when you see the sun shining through the window after a rough night.

 

[Absurdity]

It's a joke, Absurdity. I was trying to make a joke about how I looked coming here. Didn't you notice the references to teddy bears and pacifiers?

-Duxwing

Given your willingness to dole out e-hugs and pity parties like you're slanging free samples of crack, it's hard to tell when you're joking about these things.

 

[Trebuchet]

I recommend finding anything that lightens your mood. For me, it has always been reading James Herriot stories. For you it might be a particular piece of music, or an activity like drawing, or just putting on a night light.

Avoid anything that darkens your mood, even if you like doing that, as many INTPs seem to. Put aside your Iain Banks novels, your favorite Ravel tracks, and that dog-eared copy of Emily Dickinson. If you really like those things, this will be hard, but try to do it. It makes a big difference when you are fighting angst.

Video games are exciting and distracting, but they might make it worse. There is some evidence that the light from the screen messes with melatonin. Worse, it is a time waster, which can strengthen feelings of insignificance if you do it too long. (This is not an argument against video games. It is an argument against using them to fight existential insomnia.)

Put aside set theory and cosmology until you feel better. Those don't help, either.

Also, like Lot said, it won't last forever. I had that problem for a long time when I was about 12, and again when I was 20, but it did eventually end. Sometimes it comes back for a week or two, and I have to dig out my Herriot again. But someday you won't be fighting this.

 

[Reluctantly]

--I might not wake up again

Any help, please?

-Duxwing

There's a Jellyfish that could live forever if something didn't kill it or cause it to die.
http://www.mnn.com/earth-matters/animals/stories/immortal-jellyfish-does-it-really-live-forever

The catch is though, when threatened it converts itself back into a baby stage and forgets everything it knew or was before. But it also multiplies.

The creature, known scientifically as Turritopsis nutricula, was discovered in the Mediterranean Sea in 1883, but its unique regeneration was not known until the mid-1990s. How does the process work? If a mature Turritopsis is threatened — injured or starving, for example — it attaches itself to a surface in warm ocean waters and converts into a blob. From that state, its cells undergo transdifferentiation, in which the cells essentially transform into different types of cells. Muscle cells can become sperm or eggs, or nerve cells can change into muscle cells, “revealing a transformation potential unparalleled in the animal kingdom,” according to the original study of the species published in 1996.

Then is what it transforms into the same thing that it was before? It changes into something different and reproduces as well.

Are human beings really any different? We die and our matter rearranges into other life. And when we reproduce, that reproduction is partly an extension of us.

Then is whether you wake up or not again after death then just a matter of perception?

 

[Duxwing]

Given your willingness to dole out e-hugs and pity parties like you're slanging free samples of crack, it's hard to tell when you're joking about these things.

Oof! Ouch.

I recommend finding anything that lightens your mood. For me, it has always been reading James Herriot stories. For you it might be a particular piece of music, or an activity like drawing, or just putting on a night light.

Avoid anything that darkens your mood, even if you like doing that, as many INTPs seem to. Put aside your Iain Banks novels, your favorite Ravel tracks, and that dog-eared copy of Emily Dickinson. If you really like those things, this will be hard, but try to do it. It makes a big difference when you are fighting angst.

Video games are exciting and distracting, but they might make it worse. There is some evidence that the light from the screen messes with melatonin. Worse, it is a time waster, which can strengthen feelings of insignificance if you do it too long. (This is not an argument against video games. It is an argument against using them to fight existential insomnia.)

Put aside set theory and cosmology until you feel better. Those don't help, either.

Also, like Lot said, it won't last forever. I had that problem for a long time when I was about 12, and again when I was 20, but it did eventually end. Sometimes it comes back for a week or two, and I have to dig out my Herriot again. But someday you won't be fighting this.

Perhaps it was your kitten-in-a-blanket avatar framing your post, but I feel comforted by your words. And more importantly, I see your point about several important topics. Thanks!

There's a Jellyfish that could live forever if something didn't kill it or cause it to die.
http://www.mnn.com/earth-matters/animals/stories/immortal-jellyfish-does-it-really-live-forever

The catch is though, when threatened it converts itself back into a baby stage and forgets everything it knew or was before. But it also multiplies.


Then is what it transforms into the same thing that it was before? It changes into something different and reproduces as well.

Are human beings really any different? We die and our matter rearranges into other life. And when we reproduce, that reproduction is partly an extension of us.

Then is whether you wake up or not again after death then just a matter of perception?

I'm sorry if this sounds harsh, but no duh, dude! I want to continue existence as a subject, not an object; or, in the words of a rock musician whose name escapes me, "I don't want to live on in my music. I want to live on in my apartment!"

-Duxwing