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Failed psychological experiment here.

Minnesanger

Redshirt
Local time
Today, 03:28
Joined
Jan 22, 2016
Messages
6
Hi! I'm Minnesanger. Italian, male, 20 years old.

I was an INTP with a huge Ne that was annihilated a lot time ago because people. Never understood why they didn't like me. I was (am) insecure and recently diagnosed with a form of dissociative disorder. I "re-discovered" myself when I took the MBTI the first time 2 years ago and I wanted to be an ENTP at all costs for 2 reasons:

1) Ne is absolutely the best function to compose music (and I really want to write powerful music);

2) I am nostalgic. For sure I had a lot of Ne. Also, ENTP is the coolest type.

But I could not find my lost Ne. I even tried to decrease Ti to rise Ne (painful) and that just sent me in the Ti-Si loop. Damn, my life is kafkaesque.

Yup, that's all, I'm not particularly interesting as an INTP, probably I'm not even an INTP at this point, I don't care. I failed all the goals I have set up. I'm a disgusting compromise right now. I just want to write music and maybe let you listen to it because I'd wish an impartial opinion, even better if it comes from the logical scythe of an INTP. Farewell!
 

Alias

empirical miracle
Local time
Yesterday, 22:28
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Feb 22, 2015
Messages
692
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My current location is classified.
Welcome to the forum! Hopefully you'll enjoy being here. I'm Alias, for the record. As an avid music-listener, I'd be glad to give your stuff a try. What genre do you do?

I'd suggest instead of suppressing one function, just try to be more sociable. Be cool with the crowd and don't worry if you make a few mistakes. I've been able to largely improve my social image (and my Fe) over the last year. Try not to make a persona, instead mold yourself to be more successful in extroverted endeavors. Hopefully you'll find your place. Good luck!
 

Sinny91

Banned
Local time
Today, 03:28
Joined
May 16, 2015
Messages
6,299
Location
Birmingham, UK
Dont be so hard on yourself, you're a fucking awesome human being.

Yea, one of those cases where I'm happy to trust my intuition ;)

Come, share your music.
 
Local time
Today, 10:28
Joined
Dec 8, 2015
Messages
71
Location
Earth
Oh hi and welcome! All is well. Everything is possible. I have seen the exact example that made me very impressed and very proud of the person too. And even through my own weird traits and character tgat got me very confused lolol!
 

scorpiomover

The little professor
Local time
Today, 03:28
Joined
May 3, 2011
Messages
1,856
It's not gone, just suppressed heavily. When the brain is heavily suppressed, it can often seem like the suppressed elements are "missing". When the stimulus that caused the suppression is fully removed, the mind rebounds back to its former state.
 

Minnesanger

Redshirt
Local time
Today, 03:28
Joined
Jan 22, 2016
Messages
6
Thank you guys, I really hope it's as you say.

Anyway, I'm studying music with a classical approach, namely classical music. I like to think the classical "genre" as an approach instead for a lot of reasons: everything could be classical music, but not everything that is known as classical music is actually classical music. I'll explain it better: Frank Zappa does popular music, but some of his pieces are considered as classical music. If in 2016 I write a symphony in Beethoven's style, it's not classical music; just music in ancient style. Indeed, the classical music is the music that innovated. That's why it would be wrong to say I'm writing classical music: I can't know if it will be classical some other day, I'm just writing music with a classical approach. Maybe it's just shit, lol. Now I have only 2 completed pieces (that are actually pointless because they're in old style, I begun writing more modern stuff just recently): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qHxXRspxAi8 and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XVNjVxqwUAs

Sorry for eventual mistakes, my english is a bit poor and I'm drunk too lawl
 

Blarraun

straightedgy
Local time
Today, 04:28
Joined
Nov 21, 2013
Messages
4,247
Location
someplace windswept
I really liked your adaptations (compositions), especially the first one (lovely baroque counterpoint style). I guess you could mention in the description that you were starting it off of Satori Maiden / 3rd eye theme. If you can tell me, I'd like to know what software you were using for the harpsichord?

Thanks for sharing and welcome to the forum! Don't worry about being stunted in the past, you can definitely awaken your creative potential with time.
 

Hadoblado

think again losers
Local time
Today, 11:58
Joined
Mar 17, 2011
Messages
5,623
Hi! I'm Minnesanger. Italian, male, 20 years old.

I was an INTP with a huge Ne that was annihilated a lot time ago because people. Never understood why they didn't like me. I was (am) insecure and recently diagnosed with a form of dissociative disorder. I "re-discovered" myself when I took the MBTI the first time 2 years ago and I wanted to be an ENTP at all costs for 2 reasons:

1) Ne is absolutely the best function to compose music (and I really want to write powerful music);

2) I am nostalgic. For sure I had a lot of Ne. Also, ENTP is the coolest type.

But I could not find my lost Ne. I even tried to decrease Ti to rise Ne (painful) and that just sent me in the Ti-Si loop. Damn, my life is kafkaesque.

Yup, that's all, I'm not particularly interesting as an INTP, probably I'm not even an INTP at this point, I don't care. I failed all the goals I have set up. I'm a disgusting compromise right now. I just want to write music and maybe let you listen to it because I'd wish an impartial opinion, even better if it comes from the logical scythe of an INTP. Farewell!
Pfft 20? Whippersnapper you *are* the past your future self will squander. Make yourself worth squandering! :cat:

Ne doms are over-rated. I'm sure they're creative in composing music, but I can easily see other functions doing equally impressive stuff from another direction. Devin Townsend and Buckethead being examples of strong Ne in music (not classical though). I imagine restricting yourself to one genre can feel a bit limiting for a Ne dom.

I think your fixation on a particular typological outcome won't serve you very well, but you're interesting enough to want to keep. Welcome :)
 

Cherry Cola

Banned
Local time
Today, 03:28
Joined
Mar 17, 2013
Messages
3,899
Location
stockholm
stop creating mental schemata which you cant follow or which tax you greatly, it is not healthy and can lead to depression
 

Minnesanger

Redshirt
Local time
Today, 03:28
Joined
Jan 22, 2016
Messages
6
Pfft 20? Whippersnapper you *are* the past your future self will squander. Make yourself worth squandering! :cat:
You're so right. Indeed, I regret all the wasted time destroying myself. Well, I guess it's time to make some actions.
 

Alias

empirical miracle
Local time
Yesterday, 22:28
Joined
Feb 22, 2015
Messages
692
Location
My current location is classified.
Goos pieces! Try various styles and tunes with covers first to get some experience, and then see how you do with original composition. Don't be afraid of mistakes. Instead of regretting mistakes, enjoy the improvement you get as a result.
 

John61

Order out of chaos
Local time
Today, 04:28
Joined
Feb 4, 2016
Messages
7
Location
Norway
Hi there, Minnesanger.

Hello to Alias, Sinny91, IndigoViolet11, scorpiomover, Blarraun, Hadoblado and Cherry Cola as well :). Good points flourish here.

It's in fact not so long time ago somebody "tricked" me to take a test :-). I will introduce myself later when I have more time. As you all know we can be far to direct, and look for the solutions and not think so much of the processes getting there ;). I do not pretend to know the answers, but I am trying to help.

Minnesanger, as said before - do not be so harsh to yourself. I am not so sure you are are an INTP, even if that also can be a good thing. Just be yourself, relax and use some time to get to know your inner self without any form of vivisection your brain. You are a young person - spend some time getting to know yourself in a systematic way, strong sides, weaknesses, reaction patterns, what irritates you etc. You will definitely at the end understand some of the structures and systems that drives you forward. It's you and only you who will have to do this job.

As an INTP, I can - at least for me - say that it's not all about feelings. To make a system out of chaos is far more important :eek: :). I got a real surpise in my grown up years when I have come a little bit further in making a system that make some sense, at least for me. And it is very very important for my brain to understand some of the mechanisms and systems - but it's an endless job taking a lifetime :D.

Just to have said it. I am very happy to be an INTP. I do like my brain, and what I can do with it. Even I would have liked to do more, I do have to accept myself! I have no other option.

The more I learn about other personality types - the more my understanding emphasizes the importance of having different personality types. It makes sense!

Thank you for reading. I do hope it's useful in a strange way :)


Ps.. is Jean Michel Jarre an INTP?
 

Minnesanger

Redshirt
Local time
Today, 03:28
Joined
Jan 22, 2016
Messages
6
Thank you John, it's what I'm feeling right know (putting an order in the chaos that is my head) even if, honestly, i tried suicide 3 weeks ago. I'm not sure what to do now and I'm afraid of repeating the same errors.

I really liked your adaptations (compositions), especially the first one (lovely baroque counterpoint style). I guess you could mention in the description that you were starting it off of Satori Maiden / 3rd eye theme. If you can tell me, I'd like to know what software you were using for the harpsichord?

Thanks for sharing and welcome to the forum! Don't worry about being stunted in the past, you can definitely awaken your creative potential with time.
Sorry, I forgot to answer lol. Anyway, I use Aria player, the vst provided by Finale, the program i use to compose. Results are quite good, if just wasn't for some idiotic limits (the range is emberassing, the harpsichord hasn't b1 -and that's almost ok, only few types have that- and for some instruments there's not even the full range).
 
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