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Who here has musical interests/abilities?

Inexorable Username

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I'm a mediocre piano player, and a bit worse at the organ, and I'm a singer - but still in the closet.

Anyone else dabble in music?
 

Rebis

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I'm going to pick up piano/keyboard shortly, should be fun.
 

EndogenousRebel

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I'm an intermediate at the ukulele. When you first start it's rewarding because it's easy to learn, but mastering it is another thing. Obviously not having a cap as high as the piano, but you can get pretty wicked on it.

I've always wanted to sing, it's one of those instruments you can't lose.
 

peoplesuck

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I like to play piano, I havent put the effort in to be any good, yet.
I started to learn electric guitar, that was right after I put a magnet in my finger, guess how that worked out? I would prefer guitar, as it has so many more noises, but piano is my favorite, I like the way out of tune pianos sound, more than a guitar or new piano.
When I first got mine I took it all apart and painted the keys black, like a tool.
 

moody

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Aye aye captain! But we're already talked about that.

When I first got mine I took it all apart and painted the keys black, like a tool.

This...gives me physical pain...

I'm an intermediate at the ukulele. When you first start it's rewarding because it's easy to learn, but mastering it is another thing

Do you know this guy? Takes ukulele to a virtuoso level. I wouldn't say piano necessarily has a higher cap, rather than the public is more likely to be exposed to virtuostic piano playing than virtuoso ukulele.


I've always wanted to sing, it's one of those instruments you can't lose.

Never too late! Just start trying to match pitch, then experiment with air usage and pushing your range (without straining yourself!) I think pitch can be learned if it doesn't come naturally, you just really have to pay attention matching, and be willing to listen back to yourself/practice with a tuner.

But i would argue--a mute person would be very offended about that, as would someone who had nodes and forever damaged their vocal chords. Hence, the importance of learning good technique and use of air/support. So many pop singers loose their abilities because they practice techniques that fry their voice.
 

moody

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Speaking of music....I have discovered my new favorite rendition of Stravinsky's "Right of Spring."

For those who haven't heard the right of spring:

(Listen from 3:03-5:30 to get the idea)

The "arrangement:"

These guys are a prime example of very good training and musical ability, and using it humorously. All of their arrangements are on those bag-pipe keyboards and it's hilarious.


*Note: They're dressed like cavement because "Right of Spring" is a ballet about a cavemen tribe, and the climax is the sacrifice of the virgin.
 

EndogenousRebel

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This is indeed what I meant when I said wicked.

lol impossible to say anything without someone getting offended. If I said "one of those intruments no one can take from you" no doubt you would've brought up someone who got their vocal cord stolen by some deranged person. (joking)

I'm definitely going to practice, problem is I'm one of those people that doesn't internalize lyrics so I'm terrible at singing along.
 

Inexorable Username

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I'm going to pick up piano/keyboard shortly, should be fun.
Neat!

What do you think your learning approach will be? There seems to be two "styles" to playing the piano. One of them is fun to learn but takes forever to master, I think, and that would be where you sort of play by ear, sound things out, and let the music take you. The other is the kind of traditional approach where you learn sheet music.

Do you ever sing?
 

Inexorable Username

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@moody
That ukulele piece is so beautiful!

Love it. I didn't actually know bag pipes could sound cool.


@peoplesuck
What do you mean you put a magnet in your finger? That's kind of a weird combination of words.
 

Inexorable Username

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These are some of the piano pieces I was working on before I got really distracted with life. I really should get back to playing...but sometimes I feel like I have too many hobbies and it's hard to justify time on them. This is why I will never be rich!

Anyways, this song is really tough for me, but I love it. It's so amazingly fun to play, and it makes me happy!

This song is so beautiful, and not too difficult for me, and I can play it endlessly...but it puts my timing to the test. I'm not that great with my timing.

My issue though, is that no matter how much I play, playing a piece through without making a mistake is usually rare for me. Even when I can play the notes without getting them wrong, my timing still sucks! It's just a hobby though, so I tell myself the mistakes don't count if nobody can hear them but me. That's why I always play with headphones plugged in!
 

Inexorable Username

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I'm an intermediate at the ukulele. When you first start it's rewarding because it's easy to learn, but mastering it is another thing. Obviously not having a cap as high as the piano, but you can get pretty wicked on it.

I've always wanted to sing, it's one of those instruments you can't lose.

You should!
I learned to sing by learning kids songs. I also did some patriotic songs, some melodies from operas, and some church music (even though I'm not particularly religious). I think everyone learns differently, but those songs made it easier for me to learn pitch, I think, because they have very strong melodies and it's easy to find music to sing. Also, if you have an instrument, you can play the notes from the melody, and practice pairing your voice to your instrument.

I learned different things from different genres of music. I learned a lot of vowel shapes and how to go from my chest voice to my head voice, by singing songs from Phantom of the Opera. I learned how to hold a tune by singing kids songs and Disney songs, and I'm getting a little bit better at beat by singing pop, weirdly. Although, I'm terrible at pop.
 

moody

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lol impossible to say anything without someone getting offended.

Not offended, it’s just an INTP forum. Anything that can be corrected will be by one of our smart asses.

I'm definitely going to practice, problem is I'm one of those people that doesn't internalize lyrics so I'm terrible at singing along.

You don’t have to use lyrics to match pitch. Try memorizing just the melody first.
 

peoplesuck

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@moody
That ukulele piece is so beautiful!

Love it. I didn't actually know bag pipes could sound cool.


@peoplesuck
What do you mean you put a magnet in your finger? That's kind of a weird combination of words.
Took a small parelyne coated disc magnet, cut my fingertip open, jammed it in, super glued it shut.
It allows you to feel magnetic fields, along with the sensation of a magnet moving in your finger.
My achievement im most proud of, It can and will cause complete nervous system shutdown and death if the magnet is incorrectly coated. Heavy metal toxicity, and all.
Had to remove mine bc a fever :o worth it.
I would do it again if I gold plated my own magnet and inspected it under a microscope.
It was a cool short term deal, stupid long term.

Edit: accidentally put the magnet in before the alcohol evaporated, worst pain I have ever experienced, by a mile. Ive got a decent pain tolerance but I was pacing and cursing like a sailor.
 

EndogenousRebel

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I'm an intermediate at the ukulele. When you first start it's rewarding because it's easy to learn, but mastering it is another thing. Obviously not having a cap as high as the piano, but you can get pretty wicked on it.

I've always wanted to sing, it's one of those instruments you can't lose.

You should!
I learned to sing by learning kids songs. I also did some patriotic songs, some melodies from operas, and some church music (even though I'm not particularly religious). I think everyone learns differently, but those songs made it easier for me to learn pitch, I think, because they have very strong melodies and it's easy to find music to sing. Also, if you have an instrument, you can play the notes from the melody, and practice pairing your voice to your instrument.

I learned different things from different genres of music. I learned a lot of vowel shapes and how to go from my chest voice to my head voice, by singing songs from Phantom of the Opera. I learned how to hold a tune by singing kids songs and Disney songs, and I'm getting a little bit better at beat by singing pop, weirdly. Although, I'm terrible at pop.

I'll definitely start learning in someway. I've been more focused on annunciation stuff.
4857


lol impossible to say anything without someone getting offended.

Not offended, it’s just an INTP forum. Anything that can be corrected will be by one of our smart asses.

I'm definitely going to practice, problem is I'm one of those people that doesn't internalize lyrics so I'm terrible at singing along.

You don’t have to use lyrics to match pitch. Try memorizing just the melody first.
In that case, I didn't say you were offended, I was just making general statement.

Ey that would be easy to do, I'll try to do this with classical I occasionally listen to. Would you say humming is enough, or stretching those organs would be good for me?
 

Inexorable Username

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@moody
That ukulele piece is so beautiful!

Love it. I didn't actually know bag pipes could sound cool.


@peoplesuck
What do you mean you put a magnet in your finger? That's kind of a weird combination of words.
Took a small parelyne coated disc magnet, cut my fingertip open, jammed it in, super glued it shut.
It allows you to feel magnetic fields, along with the sensation of a magnet moving in your finger.
My achievement im most proud of, It can and will cause complete nervous system shutdown and death if the magnet is incorrectly coated. Heavy metal toxicity, and all.
Had to remove mine bc a fever :o worth it.
I would do it again if I gold plated my own magnet and inspected it under a microscope.
It was a cool short term deal, stupid long term.

Edit: accidentally put the magnet in before the alcohol evaporated, worst pain I have ever experienced, by a mile. Ive got a decent pain tolerance but I was pacing and cursing like a sailor.

Oh. My God. Peoples...You can't just spring this on my empathy. My legs are still feeling squeezey. (Like queasy, but minus the presence of a digestive system)....(Yeah, I know my fingers should be the empathetic ones, but they're psychotic.)
 

Inexorable Username

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I'm an intermediate at the ukulele. When you first start it's rewarding because it's easy to learn, but mastering it is another thing. Obviously not having a cap as high as the piano, but you can get pretty wicked on it.

I've always wanted to sing, it's one of those instruments you can't lose.

You should!
I learned to sing by learning kids songs. I also did some patriotic songs, some melodies from operas, and some church music (even though I'm not particularly religious). I think everyone learns differently, but those songs made it easier for me to learn pitch, I think, because they have very strong melodies and it's easy to find music to sing. Also, if you have an instrument, you can play the notes from the melody, and practice pairing your voice to your instrument.

I learned different things from different genres of music. I learned a lot of vowel shapes and how to go from my chest voice to my head voice, by singing songs from Phantom of the Opera. I learned how to hold a tune by singing kids songs and Disney songs, and I'm getting a little bit better at beat by singing pop, weirdly. Although, I'm terrible at pop.

I'll definitely start learning in someway. I've been more focused on annunciation stuff. View attachment 4857

lol impossible to say anything without someone getting offended.

Not offended, it’s just an INTP forum. Anything that can be corrected will be by one of our smart asses.

I'm definitely going to practice, problem is I'm one of those people that doesn't internalize lyrics so I'm terrible at singing along.

You don’t have to use lyrics to match pitch. Try memorizing just the melody first.
In that case, I didn't say you were offended, I was just making general statement.

Ey that would be easy to do, I'll try to do this with classical I occasionally listen to. Would you say humming is enough, or stretching those organs would be good for me?

Wait! In speech or singing? If it's in speech - be warned. If you're a weird person it might make you perceptively weirder. I have a tendency to overannuciate and I think it sounds threatening and puts people off. Just giving you a heads up. Vocally, in human groupings, it seems advisable to follow the "when in Rome" principle.

I think there's this idea that sounding verbose and/or precise makes people appear smarter or wealthier? I've yet to see that actually pan out in reality. It seems like it just alienates you....

Sounds great for singing though!
 

EndogenousRebel

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I totally get with you mean. I come from a place where vernacular is pretty high, meanwhile me talking "like a white guy", I adapted pretty well by the middle of schooling. For both really, it's more about being heard correctly and making sure no one confuses what you say for something else and being assertive. People may think you sound like a lawyer, but fuckem, I would much rather socialize with people that appreciate my effort to be understood. Unless I'm again'st the crowd, I ain't gonna be talkin like dis.
 

Inexorable Username

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I totally get with you mean. I come from a place where vernacular is pretty high, meanwhile me talking "like a white guy", I adapted pretty well by the middle of schooling. For both really, it's more about being heard correctly and making sure no one confuses what you say for something else and being assertive. People may think you sound like a lawyer, but fuckem, I would much rather socialize with people that appreciate my effort to be understood. Unless I'm again'st the crowd, I ain't gonna be talkin like dis.

I mean....I used to think that way. The fuck them way....but then I ended up being a hermit! I've not found my linguistic nerds of a feather.
Anyways, I came to the appreciation that it's unkind to use speech that makes others feel uncomfortable. I've been practicing ways to sound more approachable. I use emojis now and everything. I also don't correct my sentences for proper grammar, and all sorts of nonsense I used to do routinely.

I once had a friend in college tell me that I sound like an audiobook! Also...that it makes me unapproachable >_>

I went through a phase where I disassociated with humans, somewhat, I think - I would commonly use the term "humans" instead of people, and I was determined to be scientific about everything. Luckily, I had a friend and a few family members that are incredibly stubborn about putting up with me, and since I've gotten into marketing as a profession, I've become the most social, extroverted hermit, who doesn't keep friends and doesn't date, that you could ever possibly meet! Great strides in the character department...yep.

Anyways, I think I'm a bit weirder here. You all bring it out of me. I'm like a jelly donut. Perfectly disguised as an appropriately rounded pastry, but inside...I'm a mess! You guys are like the people that sat on the jelly donut. Yep. Sorry about that.
 

Inexorable Username

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I totally get with you mean. I come from a place where vernacular is pretty high, meanwhile me talking "like a white guy", I adapted pretty well by the middle of schooling. For both really, it's more about being heard correctly and making sure no one confuses what you say for something else and being assertive. People may think you sound like a lawyer, but fuckem, I would much rather socialize with people that appreciate my effort to be understood. Unless I'm again'st the crowd, I ain't gonna be talkin like dis.

Another thought...but - is there something wrong with talking' like dis? I mean - I don't do it...just because I know there's "secret words" that I don't have the privilege of knowing, and when someone responds to me in ghetto, I often don't understand a word they're saying. Really. Someone talked to me for two minutes once in popular slang, and I have no idea, to this day, what he said. I think he might have been being flirtatious because he asked me, afterwards, in white English, whether he should sit in on my computer science class.

Anyways, the point is, I have no hope of speaking the socially accepted dialects of extroverted people, unless they're directly related to marketing - as is the case of gen Z. Even then, I get lost. If you're familiar and fairly confident with the way certain social circles use words - why not mimic? If you don't, I would think it would make you look like you're too proud of your education to speak like "normal people" speak. Right? Isn't it better to make other people around you feel like you regard them as an equal?

Just some thoughts of mine. It's something I had to come to appreciate for myself - that it's better to make people feel comfortable, and accepted. To be charismatic. I've been watching a YouTube channel on it. :3 (Charisma on command!)
If you're charismatic, you can learn about peoples' lives, backgrounds, and perspectives, and thereby enhance your understanding of the world. I'm decent at it - but only with the white female demographic. I'm painfully limited in a social sense.
 

Rebis

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I'm going to pick up piano/keyboard shortly, should be fun.
Neat!

What do you think your learning approach will be? There seems to be two "styles" to playing the piano. One of them is fun to learn but takes forever to master, I think, and that would be where you sort of play by ear, sound things out, and let the music take you. The other is the kind of traditional approach where you learn sheet music.

Do you ever sing?

I played piano for a while when I was kid so I'm reviving that dead interest. I'd learn first I wouldn't have the natural aptitude to create a song, gotta learn the rhythmic patterns and such first.

Sent from my VOG-L09 using Tapatalk
 

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I can play guitarrrrrrr. I was big fan of guitar solos when I was a teenager so I learned to play solos before I learned chords, sort of the opposite way of how one usually learns guitar. Also, I was a part of a massively failed attempt at a band once.

I also made electronic music at some point. In my usual style I made one song, which I was quite happy with so I left it at that and never made more songs. Exact same thing as I did with painting.

It’s pretty nice to play instruments though, one gets a different experience from listening to music; noticing the different layers of a song and how the various instruments interact etc.
 

Inexorable Username

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I can play guitarrrrrrr. I was big fan of guitar solos when I was a teenager so I learned to play solos before I learned chords, sort of the opposite way of how one usually learns guitar. Also, I was a part of a massively failed attempt at a band once.

I also made electronic music at some point. In my usual style I made one song, which I was quite happy with so I left it at that and never made more songs. Exact same thing as I did with painting.

It’s pretty nice to play instruments though, one gets a different experience from listening to music; noticing the different layers of a song and how the various instruments interact etc.

Haha. That was me too. I made one song and then I was done. Unlike you though, I never completed it to satisfaction. There were some elements of it that I wanted to change but lacked the inspiration for.

I did make a couple of jingles after that which were very basic - but I feel like those done count. They were short, and unfinished. Oh well!
 

EndogenousRebel

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I mean....I used to think that way. The fuck them way....but then I ended up being a hermit! I've not found my linguistic nerds of a feather.
Anyways, I came to the appreciation that it's unkind to use speech that makes others feel uncomfortable. I've been practicing ways to sound more approachable. I use emojis now and everything. I also don't correct my sentences for proper grammar, and all sorts of nonsense I used to do routinely.

I once had a friend in college tell me that I sound like an audiobook! Also...that it makes me unapproachable >_>

I went through a phase where I disassociated with humans, somewhat, I think - I would commonly use the term "humans" instead of people, and I was determined to be scientific about everything. Luckily, I had a friend and a few family members that are incredibly stubborn about putting up with me, and since I've gotten into marketing as a profession, I've become the most social, extroverted hermit, who doesn't keep friends and doesn't date, that you could ever possibly meet! Great strides in the character department...yep.

Lol that audiobook remark is savage if it was true.

Don't get me wrong, I still talk with plenty of variation in my voice and only speak when it's something worth saying. Whats more important what you're saying if you ask me. In groups with smarter people I find myself speaking a lot less because , what can I say, they make more things obvious. I do however know people that like to sound smart and insightful, and they'll go on about something I didn't ask them about.

Everyone has their eccentricities to some degree it's all good, we all unravel a bit from time to time, humans express themselves in ways that make them feel best, I try not to judge.

Another thought...but - is there something wrong with talking' like dis?
There is nothing wrong with it. People don't always think for themselves and will just fall into mimicry, it's almost inevitable that someone in a European country have there respective European accents for example, same with other English speaking countries. In school, being one of the only visibly white people there, I didn't make this separation of being called white boy, the people around me did, and I completely understood them. When I'm relaxed or tired I may even slip into a more relaxed accent. I recall being with friends at college and reciving a call from my brother, when the call ended, the two people I was with said they were surprised with how I was talking, and made a comparison of Obama talking providentially to big groups of (mostly white people) vs. him talking to "his people." I was unaware of this.

Again nothing wrong with it, but when you're talking to someone new, unless you have reason to believe otherwise, it's more considerate to talk in an accessible way. I've had people say stuff to me in the thickest vernacular and I didn't understand more than maybe one word, but that's because I just don't know and don't have the experience to understand what they say. It's really just being considerate.

Um yes, I too have tried making digital music, I'm pretty trash at it and never bothered to get good with the DAWs.
 

peoplesuck

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this kid exists
 

moody

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This kid too (ten years old...)
 

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the cellist is especially impressive...such musical depth at such a young age, in a classical piece 9 minutes long, memorized. Most kids her age can't even stay focused on something for that long. It's safe to say she's a protege.
 

peoplesuck

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I personally think calling someone's skill a talent, is about the most offensive thing you could say. Its about the same as saying god gave them the ability, that in reality, they worked for, for hundreds of hours.
BUT YES THEY ARE WONDERFUL, I want to cheer for them.
 

Inexorable Username

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I do however know people that like to sound smart and insightful, and they'll go on about something I didn't ask them about.

Oh god...I bet I come across that way. The worst part about it, is I would assume that other people interpret that as you trying to prove that you're better than they are? In my case, I just really want to try to get people interested in a topic I like talking about, because I don't share a lot of common interests with sociable people. In my own mental world, though, there are some very cool topics we could discuss, and I think I have a weird habit of, for some reason, expecting that other people will find those topics just as fascinating as I do. Recently, I received a bit of motherly wisdom, though, that this habit of mine probably makes other people feel like a "fish out of water" if I'm discussing a research topic they have very little experience with...and nobody likes to feel stupid.
I hate it when people try to talk sports with me. It makes me feel stupid. I know nothing about sports.

I have been making people feel stupid...no wonder I alienate myself. :hypnotized:

I've had people say stuff to me in the thickest vernacular and I didn't understand more than maybe one word, but that's because I just don't know and don't have the experience to understand what they say.

I definitely had that happen to me. As I mentioned. I think.
Actually...I didn't mention the details...because they're embarrassing.
Yet, I'm about to divulge them. I can feel it. Yep...here it comes.
So - I actually had a conversation with my then boyfriend, after the fact, in which I tried to persuade him that the language the guy was speaking wasn't English. I'd volunteered for a church group in South Carolina where we gave easter baskets to kids, and they spoke another language. Really. They did. (People have tried to convince me that I just didn't understand what they were saying - but an English professor who lived in that area confirmed this information as true, and she even knew the name of the language).

Anyways, for some....strange, strange reason....when I couldn't understand a word this guy said to me - my brain automatically assumed he must be speaking that other language. I don't know WHY I thought this. It makes absolutely no sense. This was in California, and I was clearly not related to this race of people - so why would someone come up to me and just happen to choose that weird, tiny little subset of language to use as a communication tool for us. It didn't take long for the then bf to essentially laugh at me and show me how totally ridiculous I was being...

And then I felt really bad. Like, really, really bad. Some perfectly nice person had walked up to me, spoken English to me, as English-speaking humans tend to do, and I probably stared at him - mouth slightly agape, like a fish, and said something to the effect of 'what'?

I mean....that could be taken as really offensive.
One of those people probably shouldn't go out in public - and it wasn't that guy.
 

Inexorable Username

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I personally think calling someone's skill a talent, is about the most offensive thing you could say. Its about the same as saying god gave them the ability, that in reality, they worked for, for hundreds of hours.
BUT YES THEY ARE WONDERFUL, I want to cheer for them.

Not that it's my place to comment, but I think since you know you're offended by something small like that, you should work to not be offended by it. Just because, you know, someone could be trying to make a compliment, and when you compliment someone, and they're offended by it, it can really sting. A lot of people just aren't very good at choosing the appropriate words to express themselves...

For example - one of the little pet peeves of mine that I've had to get over is a sort of sexist response to my work. I take a lot of pride in my work in media marketing because I've worked very hard, and I continue to put in a lot of effort to be the best that I'm able to be at any given point in time. There's this thing though where people (it's always been women, actually), will look at my portfolio...and congratulate me on being a "strong independent woman".

My knee-jerk reaction to that was sort of like...really? You're going to look at my work, and my experience, and the skills I've spent years developing...and you're going to compliment me by essentially saying "It's amazing that you were able to accomplish this...as a female."
It's almost like saying "think of what you could have accomplished if you weren't crippled by your sex!"

Anyways, I've got to shrug it off and remind myself that they mean well, and they're trying to compliment me, and make me feel good about my work. I sometimes say awkward things in conversations that don't get received well. I hope that other people will give me the same kind of leeway next time, when the script is flipped...which, due to my awkward nature as a socialite in a non-business context...is quite often! Haha. (Especially when people talk about politics...ugh...I have a gift for offending people on both sides of the line.)

I tend to go by the philosophy that if you allow yourself to be easily offended...a lot of doors are closed to you, and you don't get to control your reactions. I don't like leaving my emotions vulnerable to being tweaked by other people. That's my philosophy though, and since I'm a hermit - maybe you don't want to follow it! XD
It'd be like eating food cooked by someone who only eats salad.

In the case of the kids though, I would probably say talent is an appropriate term. Obviously they're skilled too, but it's not normal for a kid to play so well. (That harp was beautiful!) So they must have talent...but being talented is good! If you were born with talent, just imagine the high heights you can obtain with effort!
 

Inexorable Username

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Gotta say though...after learning about Michael Jackson's story - I don't know if I would want to be a child prodigy. So many kids get cornered into living their life by that skill...they don't really have the same freedom to discover themselves as people. Sometimes, they have parents that want to exploit their talent - or business people that try to.

Child actors can get a pretty raw deal as well.
 

peoplesuck

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Not that it's my place to comment, but I think since you know you're offended by something small like that, you should work to not be offended by it. Just because, you know, someone could be trying to make a compliment, and when you compliment someone, and they're offended by it, it can really sting. A lot of people just aren't very good at choosing the appropriate words to express themselves...
Its not small though, its the same as saying wow, you did well for a woman. I didnt mean to be aggressive about it. I understand that people dont always know the exact definitions, and those are often confused. I wasnt trying to be a bitch, but seriously dont call someones skill a talent, its not nice, give them the respect they deserve. They earned it. I would bet those children practiced enough to get where they are.

Seriously, my english is a joke, im not trying to be a grammar nazi

Edit: Lets pretend I said nothing and I will just show myself the door.
 

moody

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I personally think calling someone's skill a talent, is about the most offensive thing you could say. Its about the same as saying god gave them the ability, that in reality, they worked for, for hundreds of hours.

I don't believe in talent the way most people use the word, but it's a habit to call kids "talented." Sorry it came off that way, but I think the type of connotation you're thinking of is primarily when referring to peers or a big name as "talented."

When referring to children, "talent" really means their aptitude/ability for being able to work on something so efficient and passionately at such a young age. They probably spend a lot of their free time voluntarily working on their skills. That's what I think of when I use the work "talent." Sure, a parent could force that (the "tiger mom"), but for the examples we've both shown, it's pretty apparent how involved each kid is with their performance.

It someone tells me earnestly that they think I'm talented, I take it as a compliment because it means that there's something about my playing that touched them. If it's said flippantly, then yes, it's extraordinarily demeaning.

Not that it's my place to comment, but I think since you know you're offended by something small like that, you should work to not be offended by it. Just because, you know, someone could be trying to make a compliment, and when you compliment someone, and they're offended by it, it can really sting. A lot of people just aren't very good at choosing the appropriate words to express themselves...

Yeah...in this age of political correctness, I see a lot of people shut down and decide to not say anythign because they were using the "right vocabulary" to the person they were talking to. It's syntax over meaning.

Though, I do think peoplesuck had a point about the use of talent; peers who have confidence issues and/or are jealous tend to use it as a way to make themselves feel better. I've had my share of personal experiences like this, but the word "talented" wasn't strictly used.

It was more akin to "well you're just good at that, I'm not," "you're too hard on yourself, it's not a big deal," and passive aggressiveness when people think I don't look as stressed out as they are about a performance/audition/concert/etc. As if my facial expression is proof that I don't work as hard, therefore I'm not stressed/don't practice hard enough. My internal reaction reaction is usually: "bitch, why do you think I'm doing for hours in the practice room?! I'm only crying in the corner 1/3 of the time!"
 

Inexorable Username

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Not that it's my place to comment, but I think since you know you're offended by something small like that, you should work to not be offended by it. Just because, you know, someone could be trying to make a compliment, and when you compliment someone, and they're offended by it, it can really sting. A lot of people just aren't very good at choosing the appropriate words to express themselves...
Its not small though, its the same as saying wow, you did well for a woman. I didnt mean to be aggressive about it. I understand that people dont always know the exact definitions, and those are often confused. I wasnt trying to be a bitch, but seriously dont call someones skill a talent, its not nice, give them the respect they deserve. They earned it. I would bet those children practiced enough to get where they are.

Seriously, my english is a joke, im not trying to be a grammar nazi

Edit: Lets pretend I said nothing and I will just show myself the door.

Editing your edit: Or let's not! What's wrong with saying something?

I don't think you're a bitch or a grammar nazi! I hope you wouldn't think that I do. Like I said - I can relate. I mean...I don't think people should be judged for being offended by something someone else said - that would be a weird thing to judge people for. There's just something empowering about having eggshells made of steel.

Actually - I should probably show myself the door. I have serious issues with commenting constantly. I'm like...if you had Siri on, but rather than having to say "Hey Siri", you could literally just say anything, like "My dog took a shit", and Siri would immediately respond with "Directions to the nearest pet groomer..."
Yeah. I gotta learn to cut back on the chatter!
 

Inexorable Username

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Though, I do think peoplesuck had a point about the use of talent; peers who have confidence issues and/or are jealous tend to use it as a way to make themselves feel better. I've had my share of personal experiences like this, but the word "talented" wasn't strictly used.

Ugh. I know what you mean. I've had to to where people get bitter about you being good at something...and they might say something to the effect of "You're so lucky to be so talented. I wish I could do that."
That attitude is really annoying, and you can tell almost immediately who has it. It almost like, in response to seeing you do well at something, they want you to feel bad for them for not doing the same thing well.
Basically, people who can't stand not being the center of attention seem to be like that. I don't personally like receiving attention, because I'm...uh...pretty insecure...lol....but even so - it's sort of annoying when I get that kind of attitude from someone because it makes me feel really awkward. How do you respond to that?
 

Rebis

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I can play guitarrrrrrr. I was big fan of guitar solos when I was a teenager so I learned to play solos before I learned chords, sort of the opposite way of how one usually learns guitar. Also, I was a part of a massively failed attempt at a band once.

I also made electronic music at some point. In my usual style I made one song, which I was quite happy with so I left it at that and never made more songs. Exact same thing as I did with painting.

It’s pretty nice to play instruments though, one gets a different experience from listening to music; noticing the different layers of a song and how the various instruments interact etc.

I was in a punk band all for 2 hours! I was supposed to be the vocalist but I never even sung during practice. That's ticket off my bucket list.
 

EndogenousRebel

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this kid exists

You can just see the flow in his demeaner, it's like a native language to him, fucking awesome.

I do however know people that like to sound smart and insightful, and they'll go on about something I didn't ask them about.


Oh god...I bet I come across that way. The worst part about it, is I would assume that other people interpret that as you trying to prove that you're better than they are? In my case, I just really want to try to get people interested in a topic I like talking about, because I don't share a lot of common interests with sociable people. In my own mental world, though, there are some very cool topics we could discuss, and I think I have a weird habit of, for some reason, expecting that other people will find those topics just as fascinating as I do. Recently, I received a bit of motherly wisdom, though, that this habit of mine probably makes other people feel like a "fish out of water" if I'm discussing a research topic they have very little experience with...and nobody likes to feel stupid.
I hate it when people try to talk sports with me. It makes me feel stupid. I know nothing about sports.

I have been making people feel stupid...no wonder I alienate myself. :hypnotized:

As long as you don't turn the conversation into a lecture it should be fine. Open up opportunities for interaction in between so that you get an idea of where the conversation is going and where the other person would like it to go. If people are curious, they will ask, and you will feel more connection with them, I would think.

I've had people say stuff to me in the thickest vernacular and I didn't understand more than maybe one word, but that's because I just don't know and don't have the experience to understand what they say.

I definitely had that happen to me. As I mentioned. I think.
Actually...I didn't mention the details...because they're embarrassing.
Yet, I'm about to divulge them. I can feel it. Yep...here it comes.
So - I actually had a conversation with my then boyfriend, after the fact, in which I tried to persuade him that the language the guy was speaking wasn't English. I'd volunteered for a church group in South Carolina where we gave easter baskets to kids, and they spoke another language. Really. They did. (People have tried to convince me that I just didn't understand what they were saying - but an English professor who lived in that area confirmed this information as true, and she even knew the name of the language).

Anyways, for some....strange, strange reason....when I couldn't understand a word this guy said to me - my brain automatically assumed he must be speaking that other language. I don't know WHY I thought this. It makes absolutely no sense. This was in California, and I was clearly not related to this race of people - so why would someone come up to me and just happen to choose that weird, tiny little subset of language to use as a communication tool for us. It didn't take long for the then bf to essentially laugh at me and show me how totally ridiculous I was being...

And then I felt really bad. Like, really, really bad. Some perfectly nice person had walked up to me, spoken English to me, as English-speaking humans tend to do, and I probably stared at him - mouth slightly agape, like a fish, and said something to the effect of 'what'?

I mean....that could be taken as really offensive.
One of those people probably shouldn't go out in public - and it wasn't that guy.
That story is hilarious because I know what you mean, even in Spanish when people talk to me in thick accents I'll doubt that they know how the language works xP. Live and learn.
 

moody

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Basically, people who can't stand not being the center of attention seem to be like that. I don't personally like receiving attention, because I'm...uh...pretty insecure...lol....but even so - it's sort of annoying when I get that kind of attitude from someone because it makes me feel really awkward. How do you respond to that?

Just eat it and be like, “wow, I don’t know what that’s like, must really suck to be untalented” and flip your hair.

Whenever I’ve responded partronizingly like that, it makes them more mad, but they can’t do anything about it because THEY were the ones who said that they’re untalented. :disdain:

Another solution is to not react to it and smile, and that also makes them feel upset when they can’t make you feel awkward. If you’re pissed about it in the moment, you could then mention how you just work on fixing what you make mistakes on, instead on excepting them. Or that you just have a high standard for yourself. That really will tickle them.
 

peoplesuck

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You can just see the flow in his demeaner, it's like a native language to him, fucking awesome.
Thats what I want for myself. I suck at playing piano, but I can still get that flow. Its sort of the best
 

moody

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@Inexorable Username

At a competition in middle school, I was talking to another competitor in middle school. When I said my name, they said (innocuously) “oh! My teacher said you’re the only one I worry about beating.”

And that made me SO nervous that I didn’t do very well, and they did beat me, and were very smug...
 

redbaron

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I'm going to pick up piano/keyboard shortly, should be fun.

remember to bend your back and keep your legs straight
 

walfin

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I play the piano, guitar and bagpipes.
 

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I never understood this enthusiasm for little kids with "talent", like when they get some kid on a morning show to solve an equation. "Look! He is a genius!" they say when the kid does some basic stuff which is slightly above high-school level math. I think people want to believe in the concept of natural talent because it automatically justifies whatever skill level they have in various things.

I like the philosophy Glenn Gould had on artistic performance – that it's not a competitive sport and it's not about the performer (which is why he ultimately retreated from live performance altogheter)

 

redbaron

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i play the dums

i think the cool thing about learning instruments is that they make you start to hear music in a completely different way as you learn them

a worthwhile side hobby for anyone
 
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