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Am I too serious?

Methodician

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I feel like I take everything soooo seriously. I would have thought a forum of INTP's would have left me a little more at ease about this but you guys aren't like me. Is there something wrong with me? Should I not be taking every little thing in life so seriously? I mean I know how to joke around but quickly snap right back into straight-faced, ever-serious Methodician. What's up with that?

Also, why do you joke around? What's the benefit if you don't ultimately learn or teach anything in the process? Do you get more playful during stressful times, to relieve stress? Because I just get more serious until I dig out of the stress...

It's weird because I'm one of the happiest, most zenful, least-stressed people I know. The sky could be falling and it'd hardly break my calm smile as I serenely sought shelter for myself and loved ones.

I do like storks: :storks:

C'mon. Be my therapist guys... Methodician needs help too!
 

The Void

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If you are as content as happy as you claim to be, then in what matter do you need help?
May be it is because, you are content, thats why you don't feel like being too unserious or make jokes. I real life, I appear to be a bit serious too, inside, I am neither serious nor unserious.
If you are happy and stress-free why do you need to create problems out of your situations?
Do you seriously want to be unserious?
Then you are not serious about being serious.
Then you are unserious about being serious.
Thus you are unserious. Congratz.
 

Auburn

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Hi again.

It's curious. To me what you're describing sounds like Ji rigidity (Ti perhaps). The "absolute" disposition of Ti -- that is to say, the extremity of it in as isolated a case as possible -- is one that is entirely emotionally flat/blank, zen, stoic, unsarcastic, unfunny, unwitty, and which endlessly contemplates things with the purpose in mind to gain more refined 'meaning'.

That is to say, with each life-event that transpires, the impetus is to use it as a means to deduce things further -- so each second of life has what seems like a very serious vibe. Although simultaneously it's not at all the type of "serious" that is stressed over over-worried, but the exact opposite. An entirely zen, sobriety.

I suspect that Ti has an ability to literally disassociate parts of the mind, when fully engaged, to where the lymbic and lower parts of the brain aren't being 'registered' very much. In this way Ti-leads are almost anti-stress by nature.

p.s. -- none of this implies higher intelligence toward Ti-leads. Many a Ti-lead is utterly clueless about life's causalities despite their endless analysis, because understanding life fully requires engaging all aspects of the brain. So the zen-state of Ti-leads births only a very specialized intelligence since it discards or override other parts of the brain's input to sustain its dispassion.
 

peoplesuck

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shave your eyebrows and dont worry what anyone thinks.
 

Cherry Cola

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You seem anxious about something. I don't know what though, hence I can't really say anything.

The whole "too serious"-thing seems like a projection. Being serious in itself is not a problem, being too serious is I guess, but in what way are you too serious? And what is the problem it you being too serious is causing? I don't see you as too serious either, you just seem pretty calm and mature.
 

Methodician

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Hi again.

It's curious. To me what you're describing sounds like Ji rigidity (Ti perhaps). The "absolute" disposition of Ti -- that is to say, the extremity of it in as isolated a case as possible -- is one that is entirely emotionally flat/blank, zen, stoic, unsarcastic, unfunny, unwitty, and which endlessly contemplates things with the purpose in mind to gain more refined 'meaning'.

That is to say, with each life-event that transpires, the impetus is to use it as a means to deduce things further -- so each second of life has what seems like a very serious vibe. Although simultaneously it's not at all the type of "serious" that is stressed over over-worried, but the exact opposite. An entirely zen, sobriety.

I suspect that Ti has an ability to literally disassociate parts of the mind, when fully engaged, to where the lymbic and lower parts of the brain aren't being 'registered' very much. In this way Ti-leads are almost anti-stress by nature.

p.s. -- none of this implies higher intelligence toward Ti-leads. Many a Ti-lead is utterly clueless about life's causalities despite their endless analysis, because understanding life fully requires engaging all aspects of the brain. So the zen-state of Ti-leads births only a very specialized intelligence since it discards or override other parts of the brain's input to sustain its dispassion.

THAT is an interesting analysis. Those moments when the pressing seriousness goes away are usually very E... and usually the kind of cathartic terminus of a long day. Moments rolling in the floor and laughing with my girlfriend; the polar Se zen of a long run through the park, taking in the sights and appreciating the geese and trees and bugs; the moments at the end of a good movie when you don't know what's next, the Ne moments of elated discovery...

Thinking this way reminds me of the many moments I'm not so serious. It's not just about "joking around"... just because I'm not a big kidder doesn't mean I'm "too serious"... and maybe it's just fine to take most of life in a very serious light so long as it doesn't stress me out or lead to anxiety.

However, it may ease my concerns to go out of my way to more frequently embrace those parts of my psyche that aren't so focused and serious all the time...
 

Methodician

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You seem anxious about something. I don't know what though, hence I can't really say anything.

Yeah - maybe. I'm not at the place I thought I'd be in life. I'm working a desk job, not following my dreams. I had so many big ideas and crazy plans it seems a shame. Maybe I suffer a lingering anxiety about my need to move on to a next stage of life... Also, I'm pretty dead-set on the goal of achieving immortality and that may lead to a bit of true stress, though I rarely feel "stressed"... anxiety though, I get that from time to time.

The whole "too serious"-thing seems like a projection. Being serious in itself is not a problem, being too serious is I guess, but in what way are you too serious? And what is the problem it you being too serious is causing? I don't see you as too serious either, you just seem pretty calm and mature.

I can't think of any real problem it's causing. I just feel out of place because the people around me joke about things, or get overly excited about inconsequential events, and I for the life of me can not partake. Maybe the real problem is a sense of isolation. I just don't fit in and probably never will....
 

Pyropyro

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Also, why do you joke around? What's the benefit if you don't ultimately learn or teach anything in the process? Do you get more playful during stressful times, to relieve stress? Because I just get more serious until I dig out of the stress...

Well it relaxes me and the people around me so it's a win-win. It's actually a great way of learning something since some clients/people are more willing to share some info with guys they share laughs with. Of course, there's a time for follies and a time for seriousness even in conversations.

I usually procrastinate and play computer games to relieve stress though.

Methodician said:
Yeah - maybe. I'm not at the place I thought I'd be in life. I'm working a desk job, not following my dreams. I had so many big ideas and crazy plans it seems a shame. Maybe I suffer a lingering anxiety about my need to move on to a next stage of life... Also, I'm pretty dead-set on the goal of achieving immortality and that may lead to a bit of true stress, though I rarely feel "stressed"... anxiety though, I get that from time to time.

I'm relieved that I'm not the only one having issues with moving on life's next stages.

Methodician said:
I can't think of any real problem it's causing. I just feel out of place because the people around me joke about things, or get overly excited about inconsequential events, and I for the life of me can not partake. Maybe the real problem is a sense of isolation. I just don't fit in and probably never will...

Sound's like you're having troubles with Fe (I hate that function). We really suck at using Fe but unfortunately our group interactions are influenced by that function.

Sometimes I argue myself out of that feeling. If I can't find a reason why I should feel alone then I force myself to interact with people/ do the necessary stuff. The argument takes a long time though and it can take me several minutes or a few hours (if I'm feeling particularly anxious) to convince myself.
 

Base groove

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Not sure how common this is but I tend to be very fickle about the things I take seriously and the things I don't. There is no algorithm or formula to deduce whether a given subject is serious or not.
 

Jennywocky

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More stork smilies.

You can do it.




I usually am deathly serious while utterly whimsical simultaneously, if that helps. And yes, I guess you can attribute that to the interplay of Ji + Pe. There's seriousness in my humor and absurdity in my solemnity. I don't know how to survive without both playing at once.

I don't know if you have to totally feel like you fit in, in order to find humor in things. I can connect adequately with others and identify as a human being, even if I usually always feel like an outlier. I don't even have anywhere to go for Easter this year, but on some level I don't even care (and I'm blowing off a get-together the night before with friends because I just don't feel like going and being around people). There's just always a gap there of some magnitude. But I still can laugh with the best of them.

life is all rather crazy, even in its seriousness. Living in too much Ji will kill you, and you can't really understand the world unless you flow with it on some level. Pe surrenders to it, pings off it, bounces all around, and "gets the gist" of what's going on by its exploration.
 

redbaron

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It's all relative anyway. Some people call things obsessions that I simply call dedication.

As for the play thing, there's things you can learn about sandpits if you kick the sand around, that you won't learn otherwise. Or something like that. The skills one can learn during play are often as important as skills learned through being, "serious".

Sometimes you might even find the two naturally complement each other.
 

The Void

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The apparent playfull jesters and fools are often the most serious of all. Just saying.
 

Jennywocky

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The apparent playfull jesters and fools are often the most serious of all. Just saying.

Heck, just read Shakespeare or Guy Gavriel Kay. The jester is usually the mouthpiece for truth and is the only one who can tell the emperor he has no clothes w/o fear of punishment.
 

Methodician

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It's all relative anyway. Some people call things obsessions that I simply call dedication.

As for the play thing, there's things you can learn about sandpits if you kick the sand around, that you won't learn otherwise. Or something like that. The skills one can learn during play are often as important as skills learned through being, "serious".

Sometimes you might even find the two naturally complement each other.

A good point about the value of play. I do think I have plenty of "play" in my life. I'd go so far as to call myself especially playful, even child-like in nature. So, one thing I'm learning from this thread is that perhaps my perceived "seriousness" is actually just combined difficulty with humor and tendency not to get excited about trivial things. I get very, very excited at things others do not (though it doesn't always show on the outside), and find humor in obscure places. Maybe it all evens out.
:balance::balance::balance:
 

Methodician

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:pigs: More pork smiles...
I usually am deathly serious while utterly whimsical simultaneously, if that helps.
Yeah, I think it does. I'm realizing that maybe the "seriousness" I'm feeling is something else. Whimsical definitely describes me, as anyone close will agree.

life is all rather crazy, even in its seriousness. Living in too much Ji will kill you, and you can't really understand the world unless you flow with it on some level. Pe surrounds to it, pings off it, bounces all around, and "gets the gist" of what's going on by its exploration.
^that... no comment really just found it insightful.
 

Grayman

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Too serious about how serious you are.

I say just lay back and let you be you. There is plenty of time to be seriious when we are dead.
 

Methodician

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Too serious about how serious you are.

I say just lay back and let you be you. There is plenty of time to be seriious when we are dead.

I find this confusing and perhaps irrational... Was this supposed to be a "joke" to get me un-serious?
 

Grayman

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I find this confusing and perhaps irrational... Was this supposed to be a "joke" to get me un-serious?

It was not really a joke as it was more the truth phrased in a playful manner.... I suppose that is what most jokes are...?

You are looking at how you are more serious than most and this makes you wonder why. Perhaps you are worried about this?


Have you looked at why you feel the need to be serious? Is there something you dislike about humor? Do you find it impractical? Do you feel a sense of purpose in your seriousness? Maybe even pride?

It doesn't really matter if we are less serious than you. What matters is if you like the reasons on why you are the way you are, while being honest and open with yourself.

In my opinion, it is good to find humor in the world. It can be a dark place and although humor may seem impractical in a strict utilitarian sense, it can help keep a person strong in difficult spots. If humor can accomplish goals by emotional means then in a sense it is utilitarian.


...maybe you are simply incapable of understanding why people find things humorous.
 

The Void

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Plot twist: This thread is a joke.
 

Methodician

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Haha yeah why not?

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