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Forever undecided on my type. Help me, wise ones.

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Joined
Jan 19, 2013
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Canada, eh?
I got into MBTI when I was pretty young and always believed myself to be an INTP. As I wouldn't have been a fully developed person at that point haha, and worry that I was pigeonholing myself into a type that I idealized, I was hoping for the opinions of the All Wise INTPForum members. I'm just going to ramble off a list of hopefully revealing characteristics/behaviours I associate myself with:


  • I need answers, logical reasons. As a kid it drove me insane when my ISTJ mother would give me "because I said so"isms, or when it was clear she wasn't really being reasonable (from my perspective, of course). This is something that hasn't faded at all, it's just gotten worse. For example, I have a lot of existential angst. I want answers to questions that can't effectively be answered with anything but opinion. I scrape the bottom of the bucket and keep searching deeper even after drawing conclusions I'm satisfied with. It's horrible, lol.
  • Fairly recently, I took this online test that was supposed to tell you some of your primary character traits. My top 2, which I was surprised by and really agreed with, were perspective and appreciation of beauty and excellence. In regard to perspective, I've always been sort of proud of mine. I feel as though I have a unique view on life, and have always been pleased with my unnecessary level of self-awareness. You know, I love things like the concept of absurdism, and feel empowered by it. I am very aware that people are the way they are for a reason, that we're all flawed people, and try to be open-minded and forgiving as a result. As for appreciation of beauty/excellence -- that caught me off guard, as it was #2, but struck a chord with me. A really good movie can move me -- good cinematography, writing, thematics, etc. impress the shit out of me. I love being in and around nature, and my eyes are always drawn to a good view.
  • I struggle with communicating what goes on in my head. I feel like it's hard for people to effectively understand me (the majority, there are certainly exceptions) and often feel overlooked. I don't know how to talk about my feelings, what drives me, etc. It makes it difficult for me to connect with people, something I obviously desire, and as a result, I think I have become a bit of a socially anxious person. Contradictory, though, is that in writing these things tend to come out much better. I can pick and choose words to accurately convey my point, can take the time to unfold what I'm getting at.
  • Introspection and self-analysis are plentiful in my world. I think about why I do the things that I do, what I can do to improve myself as a human being. That said, this judgment comes from an internal sense of right and wrong -- what I would like to be, not what everyone else wants me to be. Though I do have the desire, as I mentioned, to fit in to an extent.
  • At this very moment, there are about 10 skills or hobbies I'd like to devote time to. A lot of the time, I contemplate and research something I'm interested in and never actually get around to it. For example, I can play 5 instruments, but don't know any music theory. I think about how beneficial that could be to furthering my skills, and yet never really commit to it. I'm ADHD, mind you...
  • I sometimes avoid but am generally enthralled by new experiences. I think experiencing new things, getting out of your comfort zone, is kind of pivotal to living life fully. My avoidance can upset me, because I seriously get a kick out of a new environment to absorb, a new skill or situation to dive into. When I'm in a new place, I tend to look around and absorb it -- almost with a kind of childish wonder. Although rather than it being strictly a sensory experience, usually I'm just considering all the new thoughts and input it gives me, and like normal spend a lot of time in my head, haha
  • In a lot of cases, I have a knee-jerk reaction towards what is right or wrong, but with a good argument (with someone or myself) or evidence, I will certainly change my position. Prior to that, I may just need to check all sides for chinks in their armour. Some devil's advocate for the purpose of understanding rather than being an ass.
  • I greatly enjoy comedy but am very selective. I'm immediately repelled by sitcoms with a laugh track (laugh now!!! funny joke ha ha haaa) or comedians that don't really say anything with their jokes. I love Louis CK and Bo Burnham. Shows like Archer, Ricky Gervais shows (only earlier work with Stephen Merchant), Rick and Morty, Bojack Horseman. Not just based on my own opinion, I'm also aware I'm fairly funny. Dry, dark humour. Wit and sarcasm. Absurdity.
That's all I can think of at the moment. Looking back, wrote quite a bit, though. Sorry about that. Would love to hear anyone's opinions! Preferably with some explanation so I can see where you're coming from.

 
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