HDINTP
Well-Known Member
Rather how probable to your estimation.
I am supposed to be INTP (I understand typology is not ideal and do not prefer pigeonholing myself but...). However I find myself exhibiting ISTP traits at times (mainly those times I stop doubting myself too much or am under influence of alcohol, sleep deprived mildly etc.) Also when I am in a bad mood on given day?
I was also thinking how much can that be contributed to my father's influence since he himself probably is an ISTP...?
The thing is I do not care about social system, trying to fit in socially. Back in the day when I was a kid I had great trouble, used to be bullied. There comes father factor in yet again. Some people would maybe break down in that situation in worst cases commit a suicide (had issues with that as well throughout life never tried in reality though (read not physically give it a try). In the end I decided cut kind of moods like that of which I enclose to me inheriting psychological resistance from my father (if such a thing is possible...?)
As time passed by and I got older then I thought I found "my way" became more adaptive to collective but at the same time felt less and less need to "be part of the group. Today I would say I truly unconventional person with almost non-existent desire to belong because I should, it is standard etc. I myself choose who I want to, where and what I want to (some people call it weird.
This brings me to my next point. Couple (maybe 4-5) years back I got confused for I could not identify myself in male hieararchy. After researching on the subject I came to the conclusion I stand outside of this "social game" as kind of independent observer.
For the reason mentioned above (not getting myself into any fixed category) I was never truly satisfied in this regard and say like "that's it".
So I think that the current form of me came as a result of me not breaking down and refusal to accept role of "supposed weird idiot" since I "knew" I was not + mixed with some psychological aspects of personality from my father...
Now I would say I find my ISTP tendencies come on surface when I need to work/come across as socially more adept being to reach my objective when I find it the best way. But then again at times it just comes at different times/situtations where am not really willing or aware to some extent (compare it to autopilot if you would...). So I end up confused and ask myself "Is it real me? What am I? So when exactly do I act truly as myself? I guess you understand...
So I would like to have your take on all of this (especially the INTP/ISTP thing) Maybe some hybrid is possible...?
Thanks, HD
PS: I do not find refusal to go with the crowd problematic. My family however voiced concerns of me getting more and more isolated from society and that if I at least made some great discovery people would tolerate me more. Truth is I do not find myself out. Though people that do nto know me well (most) would be surprised I had "normal" social life too just not really exited to talk about it... Explaining to some people gets tedious (I do not have to tell you)...?
Ahh Also this: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schizoid_personality_disorder semms pretty accurate. Except I would not clasiffy it a disorder (this is different story - have to smile when I think of it - When something is different and not as majority people label it as unhealthy often...
. For me "normal people" at their best
I am supposed to be INTP (I understand typology is not ideal and do not prefer pigeonholing myself but...). However I find myself exhibiting ISTP traits at times (mainly those times I stop doubting myself too much or am under influence of alcohol, sleep deprived mildly etc.) Also when I am in a bad mood on given day?
I was also thinking how much can that be contributed to my father's influence since he himself probably is an ISTP...?
The thing is I do not care about social system, trying to fit in socially. Back in the day when I was a kid I had great trouble, used to be bullied. There comes father factor in yet again. Some people would maybe break down in that situation in worst cases commit a suicide (had issues with that as well throughout life never tried in reality though (read not physically give it a try). In the end I decided cut kind of moods like that of which I enclose to me inheriting psychological resistance from my father (if such a thing is possible...?)
As time passed by and I got older then I thought I found "my way" became more adaptive to collective but at the same time felt less and less need to "be part of the group. Today I would say I truly unconventional person with almost non-existent desire to belong because I should, it is standard etc. I myself choose who I want to, where and what I want to (some people call it weird.
This brings me to my next point. Couple (maybe 4-5) years back I got confused for I could not identify myself in male hieararchy. After researching on the subject I came to the conclusion I stand outside of this "social game" as kind of independent observer.
For the reason mentioned above (not getting myself into any fixed category) I was never truly satisfied in this regard and say like "that's it".
So I think that the current form of me came as a result of me not breaking down and refusal to accept role of "supposed weird idiot" since I "knew" I was not + mixed with some psychological aspects of personality from my father...
Now I would say I find my ISTP tendencies come on surface when I need to work/come across as socially more adept being to reach my objective when I find it the best way. But then again at times it just comes at different times/situtations where am not really willing or aware to some extent (compare it to autopilot if you would...). So I end up confused and ask myself "Is it real me? What am I? So when exactly do I act truly as myself? I guess you understand...
So I would like to have your take on all of this (especially the INTP/ISTP thing) Maybe some hybrid is possible...?
Thanks, HD
PS: I do not find refusal to go with the crowd problematic. My family however voiced concerns of me getting more and more isolated from society and that if I at least made some great discovery people would tolerate me more. Truth is I do not find myself out. Though people that do nto know me well (most) would be surprised I had "normal" social life too just not really exited to talk about it... Explaining to some people gets tedious (I do not have to tell you)...?
Ahh Also this: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schizoid_personality_disorder semms pretty accurate. Except I would not clasiffy it a disorder (this is different story - have to smile when I think of it - When something is different and not as majority people label it as unhealthy often...
. For me "normal people" at their best