Sad / depressive songs?

[Extraterrestrial]

I tend to be addicted to sad and depressive songs, because they make me feel something I can't really put my finger on. Is this a typical INTP thing, or just me? Especially sad love songs.

 

[Oedipus]

I think I know what you mean. Asleep by The Smiths is always a good one.

 

[Puffy]

Yep. Not usually love songs, as if I'm feeling something and want to use music to bring it out then I prefer instrumental music, as without the lyrical content there's more room to project.

Posted elsewhere I think, but this might fit the category though:

Spoiler

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=loNU4fVpO8E

 

[HDINTP]

Yes I just never thought about it as an INTP thing. I would say they make me feel even "good" maybe... do not know why...

 

[snafupants]

I think I know what you mean. Asleep by The Smiths is always a good one.

Morrissey and company only have a limited catalog of rah-rah party songs.

The ostensive party songs are pretty moist with rue and sarcasm anyway.

 

[Proletar]

Turn down the lights, lean back, raise the volume on your headset, press play and enjoy your spasms:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UqCEPytSFqU

 

[MsAnthropy_Indefatigably]

No particular interest in depressive songs, but maybe you should see what the key and chord make-up is of the songs you enjoy. I've been told (which for me, is 100% true), INTP enjoy songs made up of minor chords and keys, which are not considered "pleasant-sounding" for a lot of other people. I just went to a Bah Mitzfah this weekend which I realized played a lot of short songs using a wealth of minor chords. I loved it!

 

[Extraterrestrial]

Thanks for many nice replies, and I'll check out the song suggestions. And for those who might have misunderstood me in my first message; it's not that I only like/listen to these kind of songs. I tend to listen to more "good feeling" songs too, although the depressive ones are the ones most played.

Yes I just never thought about it as an INTP thing. I would say they make me feel even "good" maybe... do not know why...

Exactly! It's not like I sit here and cry as I'm listening to music, but it kind of comforts me in a way. I don't really know why, either.. It just does.. Ha ha.

 

[samjonathan]

Exactly! It's not like I sit here and cry as I'm listening to music, but it kind of comforts me in a way. I don't really know why, either.. It just does.. Ha ha.

i know exactly what you mean, a friend of mine noticed this about me, he calls it emotional self-harm

 

[IdeasNotTheProblem]

Yeah, same here... It has to be believable though, like "Seven Spanish Angels" by Ray and Willie. Sad songs that don't sound authentic, just make me angry.

Some INTP descriptions suggest we'll chose music that fits our current mood rather than music to influence it. I think there's a bit more to it, but it may have something to do with this.

 

[SinChroniCity]

Nothing beats listening to sad, sublime music when you're in a certain mood. I especially like a lot of trip-hop type stuff; Portishead, Massive Attack, RJD2.

My favorite 'sad' song of all time is 'Midnight in a Perfect World' by DJ Shadow I love the heart-wrenching female vocals.

 

[Trebuchet]

Yep, me too. I don't see it as emotional self-harm. It is sort of self-indulgent, but not at all harmful that I can see. It is more refreshing. For me it restores rather than upsets emotional balance.

Right before I saw this thread, I listened to a whole bunch of songs from Hair (including the Flesh Failures about four times), which probably counts as sad. I mean, it's about death. But that song tends to make me feel better, not worse.

I love high emotive content, lots of minor and weird chords, complex layers of music, and lots of percussion. They don't have to be sad, especially. La Valse by Ravel and Concerto for Orchestra by Bartok are not really sad. Kind of nightmarish but not sad. Blue Sands by Chico Hamilton feels contemplative but not exactly sad.

 

[Duxwing]

We voluntarily experience art-- be it books, music, plays, or something else entirely-- not to feel good, but to feel.

-Duxwing

 

[Solitaire U.]

I used to revel in the shit, back in my heavy meth days...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UWcv5J-iayQ

 

[samjonathan]

I don't see it as emotional self-harm. It is sort of self-indulgent, but not at all harmful that I can see.

i think he calls it that because he can tell it makes me feel good even though it should be painful to listen to sad songs, relating it to the sense of relief people get after self-harming, he views self-harm (both emotional and physical) as selfish and self-indulgent

 

[own8ge]

Yuna-Lullabies-Jim-E-Stack-Remix
Purity-Ring-Obedear-Noah-Hydes-Magic-Sword-Remix
Lisa-Mitchell-Neopolitan-Dreams-Nilow-Remix
Eskimeaux-Trinkets

 

[Extraterrestrial]

Yep, me too. I don't see it as emotional self-harm. It is sort of self-indulgent, but not at all harmful that I can see. It is more refreshing. For me it restores rather than upsets emotional balance.

Yeah, this is how it feels.

i know exactly what you mean, a friend of mine noticed this about me, he calls it emotional self-harm

I'm glad I'm not the only one, ha.

We voluntarily experience art-- be it books, music, plays, or something else entirely-- not to feel good, but to feel.

This is interesting.

 

[Trebuchet]

i think he calls it that because he can tell it makes me feel good even though it should be painful to listen to sad songs, relating it to the sense of relief people get after self-harming, he views self-harm (both emotional and physical) as selfish and self-indulgent

Some people do have a strong antipathy to sad songs, and find listening to them very painful indeed. Some just don't like anything that makes them cry. Some have been told that happy songs are better. For whatever reason, your friend finds sad songs painful/upsetting/harmful. Since music tastes are very individual, I can't say your friend is wrong, at least about his own tastes.

The fact that you (and many others) don't find sad songs painful or harmful isn't wrong, either. Adele's song "Someone Like You" wasn't to my taste but it was sad, award-winning, and incredibly popular. Lots of people like to listen to sad songs, and plenty of composers like to write them. I wouldn't be surprised if sad songs outsold happy ones by a big margin.

If it is similar to someone who feels relieved after harming themselves, then so is feeling good after a heavy workout or a spicy meal. I don't know much about the psychology of self-harm but it seems like the secrecy and cumulative damage involved it puts it in a different category from music or workouts.

 

[EyeSeeCold]

I can get in a sentimental or nostalgic mood, but sadness is not something I like to dwell in.

Considering the wheel of emotions, my favorite mood is in between serenity and pensiveness.

Here's a playlist I made to help experience that.

My favorite 'sad' song of all time is 'Midnight in a Perfect World' by DJ Shadow

I love the heart-wrenching female vocals.

Great album, I don't find it sad at all.

 

[ampotvin]

Hi. I think you should listen to "take me somewhere nice" by Mogwai. It is those most beautiful song but is considered sad by most. I dont find it sad at all, it actually cheers me up. Please listen, I promise you will like it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=luM6oeCM7Yw

 

[FrostFern]

i think he calls it that because he can tell it makes me feel good even though it should be painful to listen to sad songs, relating it to the sense of relief people get after self-harming, he views self-harm (both emotional and physical) as selfish and self-indulgent

Pffffft... People like that just don't have empathy for anyone that's not mentally wired exactly like them. They can't quite wrap their head around the fact that some people might actually enjoy something they don't enjoy. They just assume anyone who listens "dark" music is doing it from some pretentious ulterior motive. We can't possibly actually be enjoying it.

 

[Roark]

i think he calls it that because he can tell it makes me feel good even though it should be painful to listen to sad songs, relating it to the sense of relief people get after self-harming, he views self-harm (both emotional and physical) as selfish and self-indulgent

Haha I never really thought of it that way, but I can definitely agree with this.

I listen to some really depressing music, especially during the winter. It usually calms me, but I think it freaks out other people around me. So I usually listen to it through headphones lol

 

[FrostFern]

Haha I never really thought of it that way, but I can definitely agree with this.

I listen to some really depressing music, especially during the winter. It usually calms me, but I think it freaks out other people around me. So I usually listen to it through headphones lol

I still really don't get how listening to something you like for cathartic purposes can be considered any more selfish than listening to happy party music. Also love how the word "emo" became an insult over the past 10 years. It's like there's some insecure element of society that wants to snuff out any and all expression of genuine emotion. The happy police must be out in force even as the economy is in the crapper and people are more paranoid and stressed out than ever.

 

[RobertJ]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pkD5MMs1Gsg

makes me cry sometimes

 

[Late2theParty]

I've asked this question before around here and from what I can tell it's not a universal INTP thing but some do have a strong affinity for it, myself included. I really like melancholy songs and songs that have a lot of dissonance in them in general.

I read somewhere that our type likes to listen to music that is a reflection of our current mood...whereas most people want to listen to music to bring them into a mood they want to be in (like a happy party song) . I find this to be true for me personally. Oddly enough I find that if I'm sad and I listen to a sad song I feel better. Or if I'm angry and I listen to an angry song I feel better. I think it helps me get in touch with the emotion and get it out / process it.

Two more points to consider. One.. is that perhaps you like a certain level of dissonance in your music. Melancholy songs have more dissonance in them than major key / "happy" (not that everything in a major key sounds happy) sounding music. And stuff like death metal has even more dissonance. There was much talk about that sort of thing in this thread ...

http://intpforum.com/showthread.php?t=2185&highlight=dissonance

And lastly... I don't really have much proof about this... but it could also be that melancholy songs tend to have a bit more of an introverted component to them. Happier party songs I feel have an inherent social component to them (on a sliding scale of course)... often they are meant to bring people together to dance and socialize. And that's really attractive to a big portion of the population. For us not so much. So we could tend to skip past that and head for more introspective material.

 

[Nezaros]

Turn down the lights, lean back, raise the volume on your headset, press play and enjoy your spasms:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UqCEPytSFqU

Yes.

Also, these:

Spoiler

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5OMFiqNA6Ag

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cs-XZ_dN4Hc

My usual playlist consists of more fast, hard rock-type songs, but when I'm in a melancholy mood I'll play stuff like those three. The music I listen to is completely dependent on how I'm feeling, probably similar to how I'd rather wallow in sadness than try to get happy. And listening to upbeat songs while melancholy or vice versa just annoys me.

I read somewhere that our type likes to listen to music that is a reflection of our current mood...whereas most people want to listen to music to bring them into a mood they want to be in (like a happy party song) . I find this to be true for me personally. Oddly enough I find that if I'm sad and I listen to a sad song I feel better. Or if I'm angry and I listen to an angry song I feel better. I think it helps me get in touch with the emotion and get it out / process it.

That sounds about right.

And lastly... I don't really have much proof about this... but it could also be that melancholy songs tend to have a bit more of an introverted component to them. Happier party songs I feel have an inherent social component to them (on a sliding scale of course)... often they are meant to bring people together to dance and socialize. And that's really attractive to a big portion of the population. For us not so much. So we could tend to skip past that and head for more introspective material.

I don't know if this is just me, but most party music I've heard consists of a heavy beat and empty lyrics and nothing else, which drives me away on general principle.

 

[valiums]

My favorite kind of music sounds "magical", and usually sad songs are very good at creating that sort of sound. Honestly, I can't really tell a song is supposed to be sad (and not magical, or simply calm) unless it's very, very overt about it.

A lot of happy music is.. well, happy. It's blunt, simple. It can be fun, but there's usually not a ton of depth to it.


Also, wow. I like the Mogwai song.

 

[Hadoblado]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C5oScxIhZ6w

 

[Da Blob]

I have an entire youtube playlist of sad songs, but the majority of them are instrumentals. Emotions are wordless and so it seems to be that a musician not having to use words to share a message can reach a 'higher' note than those who make people think in words before a message can be shared. It seems rather counter productive to me.

But taste vary, I understand that few of the younger generations listen to instrumentals, but prefer words to chords.

Anyway here is one of several favorites...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gIuotFZnBtk&list=FL1sUBt__JhknaJ_qC3GowHg&index=36

 

[KidHybrid]

Right there with ya. I feel the exact same way. I even often get annoyed when others are around and they can't appreciate the beauty of sad or somber music.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2jKLTzbBBHA

 

[KidHybrid]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jbjSqsdcCio


Oops. Meant to post this one. Both are good though.

 

[FrostFern]

My favorite kind of music sounds "magical", and usually sad songs are very good at creating that sort of sound. Honestly, I can't really tell a song is supposed to be sad (and not magical, or simply calm) unless it's very, very overt about it.

A lot of happy music is.. well, happy. It's blunt, simple. It can be fun, but there's usually not a ton of depth to it.


Also, wow. I like the Mogwai song.

I don't know that "melancholy" or "sad" is universally agreed upon when there aren't accompanying lyrics to make the subject obvious.

Also, with a lot of rock/pop/folk music the lyrical subject matter doesn't completely match the mood of the music itself. Rhythm and blues often has negative lyrics but the music is not overtly sad. There's also songs like "Paint it Black" by Rolling Stones or "Today" by Smashing Pumpkins. Very dark lyrical content but pretty, soaring, almost joyful, melodies. The only rock bands that have really overtly depressing feel IMO, in both lyrics and music are Joy Division and later Radiohead. Then there's classic instrumental pieces like Erik Satie's Gnossienne series which seem sad to me in an overt way, but also full of beauty with a very wistful, enchanting, overtone.

 

[Da Blob]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jbjSqsdcCio


Oops. Meant to post this one. Both are good though.

What? and not this one?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ihF_aXi-Huk&list=PL400070A432AA222E&index=11

EDIT: a couple more of my favorites
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lo4lZuDoufs&list=FL1sUBt__JhknaJ_qC3GowHg&index=80

video is one of mine, sorry (?)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FPIdb1kRGhU&list=UU1sUBt__JhknaJ_qC3GowHg&index=16

 

[KidHybrid]

I love the entire soundtrack to The Fountain. Clint Mansell is awesome!

 

[spinner]

"new kid in town" Eagles. Reminds me of being......the new kid in town.

 

[Proletar]

Heres more:

Spoiler

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eUW3NieHZgs

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QiHunER3BtI

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=20AfvbYgQk4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CIV85RA6lCU

Pioneers in sad music, singing in my native tounge of swedish. They are as hated as they are loved, and I at some point turned my coat and started to really absorb their message. As of today, nothing hits me quite as deep as these tunes. Does it translate or is it just the swedish chef in melody?

 

[ohrtonz]

Smashing Pumpkins - Ugly
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fW6kwDNHfxE

Listening to the James Iha album always made my brain feel like mush and sadness. Mainly I think his voice.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jekst3XfhNY

 

[snafupants]

I'm not sure about depressing but "1979" is pure Si mush.

 

[Adrift]

We voluntarily experience art-- be it books, music, plays, or something else entirely-- not to feel good, but to feel.

-Duxwing

This is how I see it. It's not just sad songs but any song that invokes an emotional response.

 

[The Lost One]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PxFwAmYuYds

and
Blood - The middle east
is wonderful.

 

[The Lost One]

@Extraterrestrial What kind of sad music do you like anyway? By genre.
Cause I got sad songs to sell ya from anything from classical to post rock to dnb to indie

 

[walfin]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=azOIvILpIW8

Translation

Recently, you have been very quiet
What happened? Why?
Did anything make you sad?
Recently, you seemed very lonely
A little confused, a little frustrated
But I cannot be by your side

What you want, I cannot give
What I can give is not what you want
We don't fit
But don't want to give up
Sometimes when we hug, we want to cry
You try to explain, this is only the beginning
But I feel this is already the end
Let's not hesitate, let's not suffer any longer
We'll find true love next time

 

[Nick]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S_CM5-gel6o

 

[7even]

@Extraterrestrial What kind of sad music do you like anyway? By genre.
Cause I got sad songs to sell ya from anything from classical to post rock to dnb to indie

@The Lost One

Be awesome if you listed some of all 4 genres.. Dnb particularly. Really like the two you've listed.

 

[joal0503]

when your day is long and the night
the night is yours alone...

and i find it kind of funny, i find it kind of sad
the dreams in which im dying, are the best ive ever had
when people run in circles, its a very very
mad world

yeppers

 

[The Lost One]

@7even sure, I can do that.
Quoting them to avoid full linking.

Classical (not sure the technique/style is quite right but still...):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XoZJkkWX8Yw aaand http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=azGjSn52KRo (also this is minimalist http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eDN8NzIGz-Y)

Post rock:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aSU49AFzgtw , http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R8Ofl4gc734

dnb:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lwD1vQ_Gw2A , http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BwLP5LVdvxg , http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f9KghSdpGn4 and this isnt dnb but i dont know where to categorise it http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zbRCZsrnhCQ

Indie isn't really a genre but:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EMsTSdHIJds , http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=40Br07CF0qk , http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Txl5qkq-76E

also:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-m2B5JsiO9c

and seeing as I am going full out I gotta post:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ip4HrLs93OE

and sorry for bombarding the thread with music, now I feel rude :<

 

[7even]

Know quite a few of those already.

Chinensis is fucking great though, thanks. - Oh, and Clubroot is Dubstep by the way.
Antony is nice and mellow.
Carl Sagan... Nice.

 

[maj_bumper]

I also love melancholy, sad music. Or not even that, just often I find myself to music that's, as mentioned before, dissonant, in minor keys, and downtempo. I love all sorts of music, but that's usually the stuff I get a musicgasm from (although downtempo is a bit more optional, I often get the same kinda pleasure from death metal or other uptempo types). Something about that enchanting bittersweet shade of music just grabs me. I'm a big fan of the blues, but like someone mentioned, while the lyrics are often dark or sad, the music isn't always as low, more often the blues strike me as a happy genre (even if it's just laughing at how goddamn cruel life can be).

Some of my favorite examples are:
The triple combo of "Disposition", "Reflection", and "Triad" by Tool
"Insomniac Olympics" by Blockhead
"H" by Tool
"Run Honey Run" by Morcheeba & Bradley
"Ases Tod (The Death of Ase)" from the Peer Gynt suite by Edvard Grieg
"Perfect Disguise" by Modest Mouse

This one is Love Scene from Zabriskie Point by Jerry Garcia. The first time I heard it and every time since it just grabs me. It's melancholy, playful, sweet, and bitter all at the same time, and somehow very appropriate for the scene in the movie it's set against (which ends up including an orgy in the desert).
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P6_8h64pxTU

This one is also from a late but great guitarist. His name's John Campbell, and he was an absolutely brilliant bluesman worth checking out. Anyways, this one hits most of the right notes for me: the deep bass, sharp high guitar notes come down to smooth low ones, his voice conveys a lot of the pain he talks about, and I love the guitar solo that fades out at the end.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UxXsWrn_u10