• OK, it's on.
  • Please note that many, many Email Addresses used for spam, are not accepted at registration. Select a respectable Free email.
  • Done now. Domine miserere nobis.

Where do you go from here?

Esurient Fere

*grownup
Local time
Today 12:26 PM
Joined
May 26, 2015
Messages
62
-->
Location
In the mainframe.
For the older users of this site. What do you think are the important things to focus on in life during the beginning of adulthood (24-35). this is a broad question, I'm looking for something to the effect of guide posts.
For a small example a fantastic piece of advice I saw on here years ago was that as an INTP you won't really figure yourself out until your 30's. It took me a long time to realize how valuable that information was and spent a lot of wasted time comparing myself to my peers and worrying about figure out who I was.
Now I've learned to actually listen to things like this and use them. Hopefully our collective experience can help some people skip reinventing the wheel.

I have two that mostly apply to your twenties, and maybe specifically to INTPs:

Something done poorly is better than anything not done at all. A piece of advice I've found in the game design community is that anyone who has a form of working prototype is infinitely father along than someone with just an idea.

Failure is important for success. You've probably spent a lot of your life trying to get things "right" but it's important to just try things. It develops your intuition for new experiences and gives you insights into old experiences.

These are very general but it's up to you to figure out how to fit them into your life.
 

Cognisant

Prolific Member
Local time
Today 1:26 AM
Joined
Dec 12, 2009
Messages
9,449
-->
Work for yourself, seek training, pursue opportunities, basically don't rely on someone else to pave your path to success of for you to stumble upon it by providence.

Do not be disheartened by failure or the time that you've "wasted", everything is an experience you can learn from.
 

Puffy

Mindless serf
Local time
Today 12:26 PM
Joined
Nov 7, 2009
Messages
3,023
-->
Location
Infected
My general advice is to take the time to build a relationship with yourself and understand yourself well. Learn to love yourself and provide what you need for your wellbeing and happiness. If there is a need for it, take the time to pursue a preferred therapeutic path. All progress that is made in this area stays with you and improves quality of life throughout the rest of it.

For jobs and relationships, sometimes people discover their core passion or life-long partner early on and that's cool. But for most people they'll need to go through the learning experience of several relationships or industries before they find what's right for them. So try things out and learn but be prepared to let go and move on if the time arises. It's often in letting go of former attachments that space is made for something better to come in.

Try to not take things too seriously, and remember to have fun and play along the way. Also, I expect for many people we'll be working this stuff out beyond the age of 34 and that's totally okay and normal.
 

ZenRaiden

One atom of me
Local time
Today 12:26 PM
Joined
Jul 27, 2013
Messages
1,030
-->
Location
Between concrete walls
Personally I think I was always on the correct track.

I think I spend my early years of life doubting what I knew all along.

I think biggest mistake was listening to well meaning people and not so well meaning people.

Personally I think most life advice I got was pure rubbish.
Good riddance I say.

I don't think there is anything magical about any age number.

Personally I always compared my self and compared other people towards each other out of habit that everyone has.

Never really took it seriously though.

I always understood that people are pretty much same which ever way they seem.

I think its important to understand your gut instinct and invest more in that.

Paranoia isn't so bad, and mistrust is not exactly end of world.

Emotional intelligence is hubris and cliché anyway.

With bit of money and common case success anyone will be stick up your ass if you are nice to them. Reverse is never true.

Smoking is learning experience. There is just something that will tell you about people.

Quitting smoking and looking people lose their mind is also silly fun.

Some things and people never change no matter what time of the year it is.

Relying on oneself is sure underrated.

People are predictable in two cases.

When they talk about money and when they talk about you stepping on their toes.

That is where you get the true face of a person.

Not in relationships, not politics, not in everyday life not at the table or in the pub.

Only two things give a clue money and when you hurt their feelings. Especially by accident.

Just do the right thing that you always wanted to do and you are going to be happy.

That is my advice.
 

birdsnestfern

Redshirt
Local time
Today 7:26 AM
Joined
Oct 7, 2021
Messages
3
-->
Learn that very few people can be trusted with your feelings and well being, very few, and trust yourself. Build freedom for yourself - get a college degree in something that is hiring in your area that pays. We are slaves until we make ourselves independant. Do not look to marry someone for happiness, that is not going to create the independant fully aware being that you want to be as an INTP. Do, be subjective and direct in everything, just get to the point and ask for what you want directly. You'd be surprised how well that works! If you are a shy INTP, find inanimate jobs, such as accounting, geology, art, photography, architecture, electronics, programming, and you will excel. At dusk, make a plan to go on a bike ride and enjoy the fresh air - its quite refreshing and twilight is a perfect time of day to get out and enjoy the world and it has a sense of magic about it too.
 

Daddy

Making the Frogs Gay
Local time
Today 7:26 AM
Joined
Sep 1, 2019
Messages
246
-->
This is a weird thing to answer. When I was younger, I didn't know what was important or what I should be doing and why. Now that I'm older, I wish I knew those things when younger, but if I could go back in time and tell myself what was important, there's a good chance I wouldn't even really understand and wouldn't listen to myself anyway.

Life just feels like a big mess and then you die...it probably doesn't really matter, just that you live and always try to live the best that you can. It's really all you can do.

And I'm not even sure that reality has cogency, other than there being a seemingly always-present moment. But even that doesn't seem real. I think objective reality is just an intermingling of change that feeds on itself, leading to time as just a relative measure of that change, an infinite series of relative change, and a resulting holographic universe that is the uncountable set of all potential change. Pick a moment and anything can be possible. It's kind of insane, if you think about it.
 

ZenRaiden

One atom of me
Local time
Today 12:26 PM
Joined
Jul 27, 2013
Messages
1,030
-->
Location
Between concrete walls
Something done poorly is better than anything not done at all.
Prashe of the day. I think reverse is the true, but OK.

Failure is important for success.
No its not. That is what people say to feel better. Failure is part of learning and doing things always though. I doubt you can put major importance on it.

Failure is merely extending goals to unreal or beyond what you did.

These are very general but it's up to you to figure out how to fit them into your life.

I think the way you perceive and understand things certainly changes with age.

I think one of the key things is not to rely on people, that way when you screw up at least you can blame yourself without second guessing.

Asking for help is lazy way out anyway.
 
Top Bottom