I have been out of INTP discussions for a while when I got absolutely obsessed about buying a 1992 BMW 318i E30 and then I realized that I wasn't happy with it and sold it for a tad bit more than what I bought it for. Now I regret it like shit but I will be getting another one and maybe even buy this one back.
To the point, I have been having a mental debate over my career and hobby choices. Most of this has been fueled by elders in my family business being dissatisfied with how I perform, their suggestion to discuss a different career path, and my reluctance to engage with most work given.
The solution should be obvious, go to university and find a new career.
However, through my observations of other lives of those who have gone to university and those who didn't, I haven't noticed that university graduates enjoyed any more success. Most even claim that it was just for 'the experience'.
And despite their extravagant majors, they always end up in the family business.
All of those who carry the same blood as mine are very interested in the work. I stand out as a sore thumb. Being distant, laidback, and bored. Almost made me doubt my actual origins. I am slightly more mechanically inclined and "stranger-ish". Which makes me think I'd never succeed in such a line of work.
Yet, in every activity, I have always performed below expectations. This includes activities that I enjoy. I always have complaints. So in the end, I always feel like shit.
My interests have never lived long. One or two years at best and it fades out very quickly and I find myself obsessing over something else. It's never stable or constant. So it's quite hard to choose which one. Besides, currently it's all about E30s and racing. They are never profitable, at least to the extent of my family's business. It's just a very expensive hobby that breaks banks.
So far, I have decided to stick because regardless of what I am interested in, I always perform like shit and what is better than surviving in the umbrella of your own blood. But now I am really wondering if I share that same ability.
If I had the lottery sperm, I would've lived as a hermit and spent all of it buying a hanger, a bed, a couple computers, and a lot of cars. But then again I might get interested in something else.
Any advice? Should I just wing it, do what I feel like, and burn some money?
To the point, I have been having a mental debate over my career and hobby choices. Most of this has been fueled by elders in my family business being dissatisfied with how I perform, their suggestion to discuss a different career path, and my reluctance to engage with most work given.
The solution should be obvious, go to university and find a new career.
However, through my observations of other lives of those who have gone to university and those who didn't, I haven't noticed that university graduates enjoyed any more success. Most even claim that it was just for 'the experience'.
And despite their extravagant majors, they always end up in the family business.
All of those who carry the same blood as mine are very interested in the work. I stand out as a sore thumb. Being distant, laidback, and bored. Almost made me doubt my actual origins. I am slightly more mechanically inclined and "stranger-ish". Which makes me think I'd never succeed in such a line of work.
Yet, in every activity, I have always performed below expectations. This includes activities that I enjoy. I always have complaints. So in the end, I always feel like shit.
My interests have never lived long. One or two years at best and it fades out very quickly and I find myself obsessing over something else. It's never stable or constant. So it's quite hard to choose which one. Besides, currently it's all about E30s and racing. They are never profitable, at least to the extent of my family's business. It's just a very expensive hobby that breaks banks.
So far, I have decided to stick because regardless of what I am interested in, I always perform like shit and what is better than surviving in the umbrella of your own blood. But now I am really wondering if I share that same ability.
If I had the lottery sperm, I would've lived as a hermit and spent all of it buying a hanger, a bed, a couple computers, and a lot of cars. But then again I might get interested in something else.
Any advice? Should I just wing it, do what I feel like, and burn some money?