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  • I don't like being back :( I'm playing music a lot now. Trying to anyway. Favourite cocktail bar? You mean for drinking alone.. you can't possibly mean socialising, can you? Lol
    Sadly, London is not quite within our range. Someday though. I'll drink as much Scotch as I can in your honor.
    I'm alright. People keep dying around me or getting really horrible ill that death is a possibility. Otherwise I'm...ditching a lot of old bullshit things and trying to get back to my introvert roots.
    I haven't logged on here in so long, but wanted to say, thank you for your visitor message. :D I need to come around more, hope to see you around too. :)
    Yes very happy. It was just what I needed, feel thoroughly refreshed (see what I did there? Talking about feelings. Lol). I'm going to stay in Sydney for the next 6 months and just see from there. Still would like to be a nomad. What have you been up to?
    Well I'm back in Sydney. Never did get to Europe. Philippines is my second home now. Even though they didn't like me overstaying my visa and fining me.
    Hahaha. I like my brother's, just think of the most ludicrous things... "I've got to meet Obama at 10:30am, then I've got the G20 summit after lunch, then head over to play Champion's League in Madrid with Ronaldo..."
    Cheap booze huh... I'm not even allowed to drink anymore :(
    Do people ask you "what do you do all day?" since you stopped working? I'm so tired of answering that question!
    Probably Philippines! I'm just not interested in a comfort holiday anymore, or even a cultural one. Just want to do some volunteering, give help to people who need it. I'd still like to squeeze in Iceland during summer, budget is waning though lol...
    Don't they speak French in Belgium? French is weird as hell? Lol.
    I've actually gone home to Sydney, I've been here for a week. I mistakenly thought it was cheaper than it actually was to get a flight home, because I misread the currency on the airline's website :/
    I don't think I told you how sick I was, stomach ulcer or something. That's the main reason I came back but I was suspect whether it was caused by stress of being homesick. I feel I've got my mojo back now so am ready to fly out again (a bit less ready than I could have been because of my airline ticket price misjudgement :/ ) but don't want to head to Europe just now with all your crazy snowstorms!
    I guess my past attempt to be normal that I used to talk to you about, was really a roundabout way of seeking belonging. If I could be normal, I could finally belong...
    Ideally I'd go home for a week or so, recharge, then head back out. Australia's just so far though. I've always envied you guys in Europe where you can be in a different country with a different language in 2 hours. Partly why I was always so desperate to go.
    Yeah I've hit a block. Think I'll go home. Not that I really belong in Sydney. But it's the closest I've got.
    Hmmm I don't look too closely at types, I think once you start going "Is he/she/I really that type??" then you get confused and shit gets blurry. I'd be surprised if you're ENFP anyway. You just don't seem extroverted to me.

    Life on the road was ok until I first got mildly bored, then horridly sick which I still am now. I have no plans from February 8th! I don't want to just land somewhere with no plans like I did here because despite my Pness, I did have a bit too much freedom and time on my hands.
    Been hanging out a fair bit with a couple of INFPs since touring (separately from each other, that is). A funny bunch. I can easily see why we're not an ideal match for them, despite being close. It's like everything is in place, can be silent together and still completely comfortable, but... there's something not quite clicking. On reflection I think that something is Ti. Can't go into our thoughts with them, at all, without getting a glazed eye look in return. Very different to the INFJ who is fascinated by them, if not quite on the same level.

    Disclaimer: not saying a relo couldn't work with one, just interesting cos I've never really got to know any INFPs before.
    CK Louis saying that sadness needs to be experienced. I don't get it. Why allow yourself to be in emotional pain?
    I'm in Manila, Philippines. I kinda like it here. Maybe I won't go to Iceland haha. Meh I have 6 months to play with...
    Just re-reading your message after a while out - does anyone actually belong here? Isn't it just a forum of people who don't fit in anywhere else? Lol.

    Ah I'm mean to the INTP.
    All my fish are dead. I suppose there is nothing else for it but to do a fry up. I'm not really hungry though. Besides, what goes well with "dead inside".

    And really I hate that whole "make lemonade" bullshit people peddle.
    Because it is dishonest to claim otherwise. Because I like watching/reading detective stories.
    this is not right. there must be only one delusion. only one meaning. the truth. artists go against the truth.
    So the difference between an artist and an ordinary person is that one has more delusions?
    I'm too shy to share. I don't understand musicians and artists, particularly the weird ones. Do they just want to experience life? create music? Lounge around?

    ARGH! Tell me the meaning of it all!! What is the "MEANING"!!! I just realized my life centered on that word. I wonder what that word means.
    I mean I know what I want. I just can't organize my head for it. If i were smarter, this would be easier i posit. I don't like this song. not sure why. too many humans. too disconnected in time.
    Ooh. I wonder what could that something be. My mission is well..I'm not sure. That's actually part of the reason why I can't escape. My mind is lounging around unable to decide. It's too dumb.

    What's it like in the U.K.? Have you been to Oxford?
    Do you see your idea of "nothing" and your activities around it as part of your hedonism or something else?
    "Somehow it seems that, at least for me, friendships grow and develop on their own and that if you need to work on them, they are not really going to work out."

    This is true. I've tried pure conscious friend-making. It's like living a lie and being a control-freak. on the other hand, The alternative, or as a i like to call it "Subconscious friend-making", is really..inactive?
    I see. I don't really like living for the sake of living(or hedonism), if i understand you correctly. There must be a mission. I like missions. Business analyst? Is that related to the "Buy nothing" idea you were pursuing? that was an enlightenment, wasn't it?

    Active friendmaking vs. passive friendmaking. or is it Conscious friend-making vs. Not so conscious friend-making? This is interesting. I think a mix of both is strategic, but I don't know how to mix them exactly. I think I have a formula for conversations though. Conscious conversing should be for igniting conversations only and the rest of the conversations should be less conscious or what I refer to as subconscious conversing. what do you think?
    I just looked at our previous conversations. It's been two years since we last conversed. This is interesting.
    Because my internal values are in constant civil war with each other. The hedonist tribe has been winning every battle but they don't care enough to create a stable government structure. The vision-driven tribe continues to plot against the hedonist regime. i am in turmoil.

    What are your plans in life? (For some reason, I like asking this question. I can explain why.)

    Btw, may i have your advice? I've been trying to form this close-knit intellectually curious group of friends for years now. But I am facing obstacles, and I'm not sure what these obstacles are exactly. I don't know if its the insufficiency of those kinds of people in relation to where I am or that my standards are too high. Other obstacles are the occasional social cowardice and my inability to gauge whether my advances on a candidate are too forward or just right or whether there is even such a thing as "too forward." Social organizing is not a skill i have. pls help.
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