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  • Well, my minimum requirement is being intelligent/ insightful "enough" combined with being a decent human being.

    What is "enough"?

    I don't know the boundary exactly. But it's higher than what I see in most humans.
    That sounds like a prhase that would be commonly associated with a being such as myself
    Remember there was that book where they went back in time? That's how.

    Were the crab people called macerons? I win the internet if they were.
    Sometimes, you just feel your control over the situation slipping away as people pile on more and more irrelevancies, idiotic cross-connections and plain mistakes and you only just manage to grab them before they roll away altogether. I don't think Ps are built for extended situation control. ;)



    - gonna try this one on for size but i'm not apt to keep a signature for long
    What I've noticed again and again is that some folks will listen, pay attention, and complete the task exactly as instructed. Then they get left alone. Others will NOT listen, NOT pay attention, and certainly will NOT complete the task in the manner prescribed. They never get left alone and they wonder (wonder?) why...... it takes a special kind of patience to communicate with these folks because they are the exact same ones who are extremely dismissive of what is being said as soon as it takes longer than 15 seconds or gets past two layers of detail.
    :) thanks.

    There's only so much a person can do. I have a hard time getting frustrated with folks IRL over things like this (Te being my inf.) because my words can get very mean and scathing, which isn't really warranted given the circumstances described (i.e. what we are discussing) - and it's like any other typical grip experience - unpleasant for everybody.

    The problem really lies in the fact that I find N-types lose patience with me just as fast as I do them, regardless of the role that is being filled.

    The plainest examples for me come from my work in the construction industry (and you a teacher), we probably find ourselves in the same position fairly regularly - as I am regularly called upon to "teach" things to new workers (as in my anecdote in that thread).
    See, by a fortuitous coincidence I was with the girl that I had the hots for in Dealing with being ignored for 2 hours or so for something official that we had to do together. I started to think about why I was feeling the way I did and whether I would feel that way if my relationship was all right.

    Then the really insecure SMS came from my girlfriend I started thinking whether I would be happier even if I was single and the answer was yes. So I'd say the last straw was that SMS, but it's not that nothing else led up to it.

    I tell everyone that it's because my youngest sister is 12 years older so a younger girl wouldn't fit into my family. But really it's also because I find girls in their 30s hotter. And they can be damn cute!!! I don't know why I find it's the case but strangely enough I find that older girls (i.e. in their 30s) act cute better. You mightn't have the same preference as me; most guys don't.
    Yes...it grew inside. Damn itchy and cannot be scratched.

    Oh, she was getting a mite too insecure. And the demands never seemed to abate. It'd already been quite tiring to "take time off" from her even during exam periods (and I don't mean no contact, I simply mean less contact).

    But, y'know, actually another reason that I've tried my best to deny but really can't if I'm honest to myself is that I had met the other girl I was interested in just the Friday before the breakup...and when I broached the breakup I thought, well, if she's insecure because it's that girl then I won't break up. And I felt she was totally silly because instead she was insecure because of some random university classmate of mine who I couldn't possibly be interested in (2 years younger than me for God's sake, I don't ever date anyone younger).
    Oh yeah I realise belatedly!

    Actually I wouldn't mind having a lower sexual desire for a while; beats going to sleep frustrated every night. Not a ladies man, I am.

    No he went to jail during army for something else. I did try to help by testifying for him during the court martial. Still got clapped up for a week. He's an idiot la. Out of town now. Thankfully I got out of the whole fracas unscathed.
    Gah. No benefits at all. I have been girlfriendless for 2 months.

    Underpaid, undersexed, underhanded...eh shoot the last word's kinda not in the same vein!

    Oh I thought lawyers were perceived reasonably positively in Oz? I thought it was only in the US. I had an American prof who said law practice by some of the "third rate law firms" there is really a farce.

    I went to law school because my friend went to jail but it's actually quite meaningless now cuz I had a falling out with him (he did something bordering on fraudulent and I was the corporate secretary which could have gotten me into trouble).
    Haha. What benefits...

    Anyway it's not everywhere in Asia that lawyers are held in high regard. When I went to an Esperanto Kongreso in Vietnam and I told them (i.e. the locals) I was soon to be a lawyer they just said "Oh", with some distaste. Whereas my friend who's a physics student got all the wows. I was told by a China friend that it wasn't all that glam there too (except for shipping law). It's only in SG where the supply is so controlled and where we still wear them Batman robes in the High Court.

    My other degree is in Information Systems, i.e. computers.
    Do the missed days later. Thanks to doing 2 degrees I have an odd schedule. I'm doing the bar in the second half of the year, so I have no idea what ideas the Law Soc has for making me do the make-up days. :slashnew:

    Oh, not that exciting. Being a pupil is not as glam as The Pupil.
    Oh ya... I double posted. Silly me I forgot.

    WTF automatic A?!?!

    Ya the worst is because I am doing pupillage now (I am not quite a lawyer yet), I have to make up the MC. Sucks like hell man.
    Ya first time. Sorta late. The doc said, "wa, fierce".

    Huh did I delete a message?
    Did seem like you were away for a while.

    I have just recovered from chickenpox.

    How are your parents after the accident and what happened? Realise I didn't ask the last time round.
    I'm no Demon. Rather a Jesus. But no1 seems to be able to 'deal' with my presence
    I could die today, and no singly fuck would be given. Not even by 'family'. I have no1.
    Even my hatred is love, just misunderstood. It's hard being an unintentional Jerk. >You give something which had an origin of love, and get rejection in return
    Hmm. I don't particularly relate to hypervigilance. I think. Though, even having unpreditcable movements (like people walking) around me is somewhat stressing and annoying me. I need complete silence and lack of movement around me at times or I notice my body starting to tense. Like now that I live at home. I have moved my laptop to my rather tiny and cold bedroom just to get some mental peace. Even though they don't really talk to me much, I just need to know I'm alone at times.

    I've never really thought about it being related to anxiety. I thought of it more as an introversion thing.
    I haven't really thought about exercises to improve my concentration. I guess when you grew up with something you tend to take it for granted that it is that way, and that it's unchangable. Unless I someday should feel entirely secure and lack anxiety. I guess I always figured that either my mind is as dull as this or that it will someday become clear due to reasons above.

    Hormonal, you say? Interesting. When I was younger I had preferred a medical diagnosis as I tend to think I'm to blame for my anxiety. I should be able to control my mind and emotions better than that.

    Thanks for telling me. I will probably attempt to get into it if I can find my own apartment where I can do stuff undisturbed ._____.
    Well. If I should happen to get upset by something that "rationally" could be said to be trivial, then I close that off and put it away because there is no reason to get upset with details. Same with my anxiety which I brush off as irrelevant when it spikes when I'm going to work or so. And since I'm always thinking "that's nothing to worry about", I think I have effectively rendered myself unable to recognize where my anxiety stems from. My thoughts related to anxiety gets drowned away, so to speak.

    Yes, I would say my default state is one of anxiety, of tension. I have been on meds against it for two years and I do notice a huge difference. But still, often it seems like my mind is "locked in position". It's like my thoughts are dammed up and I can't get past it.
    It's less often like that since I'd been on meds for about 6 months. I still feel anxiety every now and then, so I have no idea how I'd manage without them. In truth, before I got them, I didn't. I didn't even realize how bad and constant it was until it left me.

    Where the constant anxiety comes form, I'm unsure. It might have been something about an unpredictable environment growing up, not being able to anticipate bad things, so instead I had to be alert at all times.
    Talk about myself? That sounds dreadful.

    I'm very unaware of my thoughts and feelings. I think one of the reasons is that I'm constantly checking to see if my emotions are logically valid for me to be allowed to feel. If they are not, I tell myself that "well, it doesn't matter,". But then I keep on feeling sad (or whatever). It's only recently that I've discovered this pattern. But earlier my feelings confused the hell out of me. I'm also very poor at identifying what I am feeling.

    I'm constantly in doubt. I'm never sure of anything. My perspectives tend to change quickly and often, sometimes without me realizing before some time. My mind is very flexible that way, but it also means I don't have any confidence in any of my "abilities".

    Usually I have a lot of energy, and I like working because then my mind has multiple things to concentrate about all the time and that eases the tension in mind my mind.

    So there
    I accept the premise that God talks to people, cares, etc. because he does "talk" to me. No, it's not a voice, but more of an intuitive perception. The things I know about the universe were taught to me by God when I asked him to teach me. There is no way I had enough knowledge or am perceptive enough to drum up certain explanations on my own. When God communicates with me, it's not like the little voices in your head, or your conscience, it's from the outside, it's a different perspective.
    Well, I guess I had to settle for some type. Auburn thought it was likely, but was unsure. Alisa and Lostwitheal thinks I'm ENFP. Polaris thinks I'm definitively not an ENFP.

    Even you said ENFP, once!

    Did you decide on your type yet?
    One thing that the Christian religion teaches that I do practice is repentance. If I do something that hurts myself or another person (including animals), I repent. I recognize what I did and why it was wrong, and I promise myself and God that I'll do better. It's part of my personal growth and helps me avoid repeating mistakes.

    What God has taught me is that he doesn't care about the things people believe. The way he looks at us is similar to a parent watching their children play; sometimes children play that a cardboard box is a spaceship, sometimes people believe that there is a place called hell where God throws them to burn in fire. God looks at the heart, at how much we desire to be better, to grow, to understand, and above all, how much we care about others. If you live your life loving and listening, always seeking to understand and become better, then your heart will be filled with the presence of God.
    I visited there, yes :3

    It was up and down, but ultimately it was lovely, bordering on magical seeing her and being with her. I look forward to the next time I get to have her in my arms with the softest of smiles in a mind soaked in hazy, timeless goodness.

    Head stuff getting less noisy in a good way?

    I'm a bit stressed when I don't have a good overview of self.

    I Knight you cheese of the essence of the spirit of all things Canadian. May your esteem and reverence for the eh be as bountiful as the eh lifts your being to soar in the skies of joy and delight as you accept it as the lens through which all you are conscious of is shown to you and you to all you are conscious of.
    Norway as usual :3

    Metaconscious awareness and the ability to alter own cognitive modes is significantly lower than when we used to speak a lot.

    I thought it was Canadians who ended sentences with ", eh" ._____.

    What's up in the down below?
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