Are you ever accused of lying

[kyst]

..when you're telling the truth?

I'd consider myself a good liar. ()
Though I'm not much of a planner, I always take every little detail into account before I act and almost have like a talent in rationalising and explaining myself.

Ironically, the only times I can ever recall being "caught" lying, was when I really wasn't. I think this is because the way I react to situations and interpret certain things causes a behaviour that differs from how others would react in that situation.

Yesterday someone accused me of lying about my age because I hesitated so much to tell them my exact birth date(even though it was a very simple question), and might also have seemed very "stressed" about the whole situation - I usually keep my head cold when being confronted about doing something I knew could lead to it, but tend to overreact when I'm being unpreparedly accused of something. (I feel like most people would probably do the opposite, in the former situation get stressed because they experienced what they feared, in the latter take it easy because they knew they hadn't done anything wrong)

Idk it just sounded kinda INTP-ish in my head. So I'm just wondering whether or not this is something that applies to any of you as well?

 

[GodOfOrder]

No, I am known to be honest. However, I am often accused of being a chameleon. People think I am sometimes not entirely genuine when they witness my behavior in different social contexts. But the truth is I don't "act", I just blend nicely because, while I don't necessarily like people, I am amiable when I need to be. But, reflective as my nature is, it is still my own (and as such I am always myself).

 

[Hadoblado]

Yes. People are very poor at modelling INTP intentions. We just look suss to them.

I foster the notion that I am not always honest, but am when it matters.

 

[Rome96]

It has happened to me a few times.. The funny thing is it doesn't occur when I actually am lying, only when I stop to think when giving an honest answer.



This smiley is fun.

 

[B.C.P.]

^yes, apparently a moment of thought is always a sign to others that we're whipping up a lie. I don't lie very often. I struggle more with a desire to always tell the truth, especially around the wrong people, at the wrong times, about things they don't need to know about.

My last girlfriend broke up with me over a "he said/she said" situation and I'm positive I could never be convince her I hadn't done anything because I always paused to think of exactly the right words to say.

 

[Hadoblado]

I've developed some good methods for convincing people I'm not lying. The one I've had the most success with is asking people why I would lie. I then take their answer and generate a reason why that model of my intentions is inconsistent with my behaviour. It's not something that works well with people of great imagination, but those people generally don't just assume you're lying because you paused to gather your thoughts.

Example:
Person: Did you break the washing machine?

Me: No

Person: You're lying

Me: No I'm not, what reason would I have to lie?

Person: You don't want to be held responsible for breaking it

Me: If I were the type of person that would lie in order to avoid taking responsibility for my actions, why would I have admitted X that one time, or Y that other time?

Person: I have no idea Hado, obviously you're an exemplary member of society who would never lie to me about anything.

The problem is that it would work even if you're lying. My behaviour is not so consistent that I could truthfully say I have not lied, have not stolen etc. It's sort of like cold reading. In my history with any given person, I have many examples of all sorts of behaviour I could call on to prove the purity of my character. It works though.

 

[Magus]

Not often accused of lying, but I am now; a lot of things I've said before are actually coming back to bite me. I'm a very good liar, I've just been very sloppy in following up. I think a better term for what I tend to do would be 'expectation managing' rather than outright deception, as I very rarely deliberately mislead people. I'm very good at explaining things to people in ways they will understand and so what I naturally tend to tell people varies depending on what I know they know and so forth. Some people consider it lying though, and sometimes (as is happening now in my life) the silly people tend to talk amongst themselves and get annoyed when what each of them has been told doesn't perfectly match.

 

[Architect]

The best way to lie is to tell the truth, but so unconvincingly that you aren't believed.

 

[Hadoblado]

The best way to lie is to tell the truth, but so unconvincingly that you aren't believed.

^
There are four truth values defined by the axes of actual truth and interpreted truth.

1) - True and believed
2) - True and not believed
3) - False and not believed
4) - False and believed

The first one is great, but boring. Nobody likes the guy that just sits there stating the obvious.

The second, which is the one you speak of, is my favourite for circumventing social issues and feeling clever while doing it.

The third is a platform for humour, sarcasm, and disjunctive syllogism. It's got its uses, but IMO it's over-rated by the internet at large. Still fair-game though.

The fourth one is morally reprehensible. I don't do this to friends, but I'd do to it to get out of a fine or whatever.

They're all weapons, I reckon you could make a fairly good personality inventory based on the preference of a person for each one (though good luck measuring it accurately).

 

[Palaver]

I hardly ever lie, and I'm really bad at it. Okay, I sometimes do lie, for example when I'm asked how I am or what I've been doing that day (when I practically haven't been doing anything) or when I'm following social conventions (which are, in my opinion, often nothing else but lies). But even then I don't find myself convincing.

I'm always afraid of being caught lying, which is one reason why I usually don't lie. Especially I don't lie about who I like and who I don't like. I believe that interpersonal relationships would be a much easier thing if people always were direct and honest about what they thought about each other - that would avoid a lot of misunderstandings, there'd only be true friendships et cetera, and telling somebody that you like them would really be worth something. I want to be told the truth, so I tell the truth, too.

Unfortunately, most people are not prepared for that. I've been reproached for being tactless in the past. But I'm rarely accused of lying, and if so it usually happens on the internet.

 

[just george]

I can't be bothered lying, because remembering a web of lies is more work than doing things legit in the first place.

Unless I'm trying to cheer someone up, in which case it's important enough for me to focus

 

[NSINTP]

I have a tendency to laugh when people accuse me of lying when I was telling the truth, which makes them think I'm lying because "normal" people have a tendency to laugh when th ey're caught lying...sometimes I wish I wasn't an INTP.

 

[Helvete]

I tend to lie a lot (or at least white lie) when people ask me about things about myself that they don't need to know. I don't do it to willingly try to mislead them, it's just a lot easier than explaining the truth. A basic example:

A: How are you?

me: I'm good thanks. - tends to be my default small talk answer no matter how I feel or how well I know the person. Unless I really feel they should know; which tends to be very rare.

On the other hand I'll never lie about things that do concern other people. I have absolutely no interest in doing so. This results in almost never getting accused of lying.

 

[The Void]

I rarely talk.
I only write.
Write gibberish.
Call it a lie, truth, parody or wattever, your choice.

 

[Glaerhaidh]

I mostly avoid stating the truth, as I am not sure of many things, generally I use probabilistic adjectives to avoid misleading myself.

When I am truthful it usually causes suffering and I have grown to accept this suffering that is a result of my rightful action.

I found that it is much easier to make a believable lie than to have someone believe the truth and many people actually want to be lied to, however I prefer not to speak at all if I was to be dishonest.

End result is that I mainly speak to those close to me or those that, I assume, would understand.

 

[Brontosaurie]

yeah i'm too good to be true

 

[Cherry Cola]

If you lie your lie should incorporate as much truth as little falsehood as possible, thereby it will incorporate itself naturally into your memory and you wont be at risk of having your lie revealed by little details or inconsistent recall :O

I can't recall ever getting accused of lying when I haven't. It has surely happened but not very often.

Coming up with poorly constructed lies made believable through acting for the luls is great fun though. I never get away with such lies because my acting eventually fails and I start grinning instead :P

 

[Hyena]

A man is interesting when others doubt his truths and believe his lies.

 

[Cherry Cola]

A man is interesting when others doubt his truths and believe his lies.

I think there's a big risk that he'd be considered weird, but hey I think weird is darn interesting. Eccentricity ftw.

 

[ethicalhacker]

Yes, it seems like all the time.

 

[Jake]

I only lie about trivial things to my friends, just as a joke. But I'm very honest about important things, and value honesty in others. It really ticks me off when people assume I'm lying about important issues, because I don't think I've given anyone a reason to mistrust my word.

 

[oldfashionedgirl]

I admit to be a very convincing lyer (lier? lyer? leyer? My spell check say's they're all wrong!)
when I want to be. That's not very often. I do not and have not lied about important matters, maybe the occasional trivia thing I didn't want to have all over the place... I honestly can't think of an example. but still, you get the idea. I am very convincing.

But yes, people think I don't tell the truth when I do. In such an instance I am at my wit's end all of a sudden. What can I do to convince them I'm not lying? I'm already doing the best I can to be sincere so I can't try harder, just repeat is=t in a slightly louder tone each time they disagree, which usually does nothing.
So, yeah, I get it what you mean.

 

[Microtonalist]

I'm a pretty good liar, actually, but I do get accused of lying when I'm telling the truth.

My personal favorite example is when people (usually E*F* types) don't believe me that I really believe and like the things that I like and believe. I sometimes get accused of being pretentious in my tastes in music, art, film, etc. and eccentric in my belief and value systems, and some people think that I am just saying things to impress and/or shock people. "You don't really like/think that deep down, do you?" is something I hear sometimes. Yes, I do. That's who I am. Deal with it.

 

[HAL9000]

I try not to lie at all. Or if I do, it's at the base of a silly joke or prank where I'll rapidly admit I wasn't telling the truth.

I read a quote on one of those Facebook likey/sharey things that said something along the lines of, "Being honest is the easiest option because it means you have less stories to memorise."

I think it's true. I don't really lie about anything. Totally pointless really. Why make life harder for yourself.

I do, however, withhold the truth. Hard to keep it that way if someone starts to quiz me though!