Rudolph Mondal
Banned
Hello there.
It's been a long time since I've been interested in anything. A month or so I think. But a month ago, I felt excited for only about a week or so. And then it's the usual barren rock.
I go to university sometimes but I skip a lot of lessons. I don't feel excited about anything. I don't do any homework. Even when I am in school, I'm mostly stoning in one corner. The future seems bleak. I'm not good at anything. Tried programming. Am terrible at it. Everything, I'm so terrible at everything. I can't do anything. Can't work with my hand, can't make stuff, can't even think about stuff.
I do try. I went out to this Burger King joint near where I live and wrote two short stories. They're pretty crap. Wrote it on paper. Wanted to email my psychologist those stories but I don't feel like it now.
I usually have a good week when I'm interested in something and motivated to learn stuff in school. And then I feel bland, numb, listless again for more than a month each time. Those periods suck. Now is such a period.
I don't feel sad or anything right now. I do feel a bit sad sometimes but most of the time it's just bland, barren, numb. I walk really slowly, I get up late for school everyday. It's like I'm just waiting for time to pass by.
What do I do with my time? Well, just now I was on Quora, scrolling down posts, realizing how none of the stuff interests me.
It's not that bad like this. I think a good week will come by eventually pretty soon. Or maybe not. I don't know.
I wish I was an INTP. I'd love to have my brain be active again. Well, it sort of still is just that I don't find any of its activities interesting.
I enjoy playing this game called unblock me. Well, enjoy's too strong a word. I spend a lot of time playing it, I'd say. It's okay.
All ambition has left me. All interest has left me too. Barren rock.
Have any of you guys left this way before. Please do share. It'll keep me occupied for some time.
No, really, do share.
Thanks.
It's been a long time since I've been interested in anything. A month or so I think. But a month ago, I felt excited for only about a week or so. And then it's the usual barren rock.
I go to university sometimes but I skip a lot of lessons. I don't feel excited about anything. I don't do any homework. Even when I am in school, I'm mostly stoning in one corner. The future seems bleak. I'm not good at anything. Tried programming. Am terrible at it. Everything, I'm so terrible at everything. I can't do anything. Can't work with my hand, can't make stuff, can't even think about stuff.
I do try. I went out to this Burger King joint near where I live and wrote two short stories. They're pretty crap. Wrote it on paper. Wanted to email my psychologist those stories but I don't feel like it now.
I usually have a good week when I'm interested in something and motivated to learn stuff in school. And then I feel bland, numb, listless again for more than a month each time. Those periods suck. Now is such a period.
I don't feel sad or anything right now. I do feel a bit sad sometimes but most of the time it's just bland, barren, numb. I walk really slowly, I get up late for school everyday. It's like I'm just waiting for time to pass by.
What do I do with my time? Well, just now I was on Quora, scrolling down posts, realizing how none of the stuff interests me.
It's not that bad like this. I think a good week will come by eventually pretty soon. Or maybe not. I don't know.
I wish I was an INTP. I'd love to have my brain be active again. Well, it sort of still is just that I don't find any of its activities interesting.
I enjoy playing this game called unblock me. Well, enjoy's too strong a word. I spend a lot of time playing it, I'd say. It's okay.
All ambition has left me. All interest has left me too. Barren rock.
Have any of you guys left this way before. Please do share. It'll keep me occupied for some time.
No, really, do share.
Thanks.