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on a train heading towards failing my diploma

Local time
Today, 23:19
Joined
Sep 15, 2013
Messages
248
Location
Christchurch, New Zealand, New Zealand
I don't know what to do. I have 4 reports to write (one due in less than a week).
I have never written a report before, I am utterly clueless on how to write one. This report is worth 40% of my grade and I have barely started on account of having been in a defeated depressed state for the last 3 weeks. I did nothing for 3 weeks. now I want to grab this by the balls and muster something together that I can hand in. but the fact remains i dont know how to write a report and I'm 3 weeks out of date with course content thus have no idea what the terms used in my report are. I offered a classmate a bribe to do my report haha but they declined. I don't know where my next step forward is. Its like i have an essay to write in a language i don't speak.
 

Lot

Don't forget to bring a towel
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Joined
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Phoenix, Arizona
I always waited till the last minute. Maybe I'd do a little research here and there, but mostly wait till a day or three before the report was due. I did horribly fail an important paper in anthropology. I hated the bitch of a teacher.

Two option.
1. Get off of here and buckle your ass down. Maybe even ask the teacher if you turn it in late with a 10% dock on the grade. You could be honest with your teacher as well. They probably won;t believe you, but they might be feeling generous. I know a few college teacher. They throw bones all the time.
2. Drop the class and retake it. I learned that this is a great option. Better than getting the failing grade. It'll take you another semester to get your degree done, but I'm sure you got the time. Hell, I'm 26 and finally going back to school to finish my BA. Taking time off during my depression was helpful.

If you haven't been paying attention in class, option two might be your best bet. I have four failed classes on my transcript for the rest of my college experience. They drop your GPA a lot.

Best of luck to you buddy.
 
Local time
Today, 12:19
Joined
Jan 7, 2012
Messages
5,025
I have never written a report before, I am utterly clueless on how to write one. This report is worth 40% of my grade and I have barely started
So the thread title is a bit misleading, then? :D Things are still as in your control as they were a month ago.

I personally recommend seeing the world through coffee-stained glasses.
I did nothing for 3 weeks. now I want to grab this by the balls and muster something together that I can hand in. but the fact remains i dont know how to write a report and I'm 3 weeks out of date with course content thus have no idea what the terms used in my report are. I offered a classmate a bribe to do my report haha but they declined. I don't know where my next step forward is. Its like i have an essay to write in a language i don't speak.
What's the subject, and how large was/is the bribe? :cat:
 
Local time
Today, 23:19
Joined
Sep 15, 2013
Messages
248
Location
Christchurch, New Zealand, New Zealand
marketing. $100.
 
Local time
Today, 23:19
Joined
Sep 15, 2013
Messages
248
Location
Christchurch, New Zealand, New Zealand
You have no idea how tempted I am to take up your offer if only because you stated you didn't know the material, and thus wouldn't be able to identify my bullshit. :D
i know it well enough to know what it should look like, :). I hadn't concidered proposing the bribe to persons outside of my campus of study
 

The Gopher

President
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Joined
Aug 26, 2010
Messages
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It should be easy, Google marketing report sample (or check if they provide sample reports) and just go though every section and learn how to do it as you go. You have a week do like 3 or so sections a day or something (depending on how many sections you have).
 
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Upstairs
get it done.

"Some Quick Shorthand Techniques

*School Issues: Want to do well in school, but the work bores the hell out of you? The Secret: You are bored by the kind of work necessary to do well in school. It's not a conundrum. It's really quite simple. School performance is a unique set of rules. It does not equal the pursuit of knowledge. Solution: Do the boring work in bursts, then reward yourself with something you like. Switch back and forth between the two. If you are under impossible deadlines, let the stress motivate you for the marathon, then reward yourself for an extended time when you are finished. REALLY reward yourself. Follow through and don't be a martyr to yet another task."

http://intpexperience.com/FixIt.php
 

redbaron

irony based lifeform
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69S 69E
You study marketing?

I hope your train crashes.
 
Local time
Today, 23:19
Joined
Sep 15, 2013
Messages
248
Location
Christchurch, New Zealand, New Zealand
report is coming along nicely :)

Just thought ya'll should know. I only need to write the executive summary, add 3 more resources in somewhere and beef out another 500 words.
 

Nick

Frozen Fighter
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347
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Isles of Long
Are you trying to sell us something?

This *that* the real poly behind your paper!:cat:
 

Hawkeye

Banned
Local time
Today, 12:19
Joined
May 18, 2009
Messages
2,425
Location
Schmocation
I think my university is trying to make me and my class fail...

This week they added an extra module to my course which is a 5,000 word masters level research paper.

So now I have to do the following before the end of the year:

  1. 100 hours of teaching - has to be me solo teaching classes at a school which I go to Mon-Wed. (I'm annoyed I can't use my 1-to-1 guitar lessons)
  2. 3x 3,000 word assignments that rely on the above teaching hours to complete
  3. 8 teaching observations graded using governmental standards
  4. 2,000 word critical evaluation of a teaching journal
  5. 30 hours of lesson plans that include rationales on the material and teaching methods chosen
  6. 5,000 word research paper
The reason I'm in the position I am is because the university screwed up majorly. I'm on an experimental course that has not be thought out properly at all. I started in January, but didn't get to start at my teaching placement officially until 2 weeks ago. As everything is tied together, it's all had to be put on hold until now.
Without the new module, there are enough credits to get the degree. I checked my handbook and it was not listed, i.e., they have literally added it on at the end as a last minute thing.

Adding this module not only increases my overall workload, but decreases the amount of time I have at a placement where I could be reducing my already massive workload... I have to commute to this university on Thursdays and Fridays where I basically learn feck all and do nothing but rehashed team building exercises I did at the start of the year.

WTF are they playing at!?!? ASS-HATS!
 

redbaron

irony based lifeform
Local time
Today, 21:19
Joined
Jun 10, 2012
Messages
6,993
Location
69S 69E
I think my university is trying to make me and my class fail...

This week they added an extra module to my course which is a 5,000 word masters level research paper.

So now I have to do the following before the end of the year:

  1. 100 hours of teaching - has to be me solo teaching classes at a school which I go to Mon-Wed. (I'm annoyed I can't use my 1-to-1 guitar lessons)
  2. 3x 3,000 word assignments that rely on the above teaching hours to complete
  3. 8 teaching observations graded using governmental standards
  4. 2,000 word critical evaluation of a teaching journal
  5. 30 hours of lesson plans that include rationales on the material and teaching methods chosen
  6. 5,000 word research paper
The reason I'm in the position I am is because the university screwed up majorly. I'm on an experimental course that has not be thought out properly at all. I started in January, but didn't get to start at my teaching placement officially until 2 weeks ago. As everything is tied together, it's all had to be put on hold until now.
Without the new module, there are enough credits to get the degree. I checked my handbook and it was not listed, i.e., they have literally added it on at the end as a last minute thing.

Adding this module not only increases my overall workload, but decreases the amount of time I have at a placement where I could be reducing my already massive workload... I have to commute to this university on Thursdays and Fridays where I basically learn feck all and do nothing but rehashed team building exercises I did at the start of the year.

WTF are they playing at!?!? ASS-HATS!
What course\where is this? :ahh:
 
Local time
Today, 23:19
Joined
Sep 15, 2013
Messages
248
Location
Christchurch, New Zealand, New Zealand
FINISHED THAT @#$%#%!! yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy no more depressed. Thanks for all your tips and help guys. It helped more than you guys know :)
 

Hawkeye

Banned
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Joined
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Messages
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Schmocation
What course\where is this? :ahh:
This is for a post graduate certificate in education (PGCE) at Edge Hill University (regarded as one of the leading universities in the UK for education training qualifications).

The experimental course I'm on has been removed from the application list due to it being a failure. This is great for newcomers, but I don't care about them...

I've developed some notoriety with the big-wigs around the campus. Last Friday I got told off by the head of education for providing the epic soundtrack to my class switching classrooms*. Apparently, directing my class to the new room playing Free's All Right Now on an unplugged electric guitar isn't allowed. ^^


* It should be noted that we required computers for that particular lesson and were given a room without computers. :/

One time, our room wasn't even booked and so we had to have it outside by a pond full of ducks. This doesn't sound too bad until you realise that this is a 3 hour lesson outside in the blazing sun with no shade and no sun lotion...
 

redbaron

irony based lifeform
Local time
Today, 21:19
Joined
Jun 10, 2012
Messages
6,993
Location
69S 69E
This is for a post graduate certificate in education (PGCE) at Edge Hill University (regarded as one of the leading universities in the UK for education training qualifications).

The experimental course I'm on has been removed from the application list due to it being a failure. This is great for newcomers, but I don't care about them...

I've developed some notoriety with the big-wigs around the campus. Last Friday I got told off by the head of education for providing the epic soundtrack to my class switching classrooms*. Apparently, directing my class to the new room playing Free's All Right Now on an unplugged electric guitar isn't allowed. ^^


* It should be noted that we required computers for that particular lesson and were given a room without computers. :/

One time, our rooms wasn't even booked and so we had to have it outside by a pond full of ducks. This doesn't sound too bad until you realise that this is a 3 hour lesson outside in the blazing sun with no shade and no sun lotion...
Wow, that sucks...

I like ducks.
 
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