Will you always be the same personality?

[FlyingSquid]

Hello there, as you may expect, I am an INTP, while my mother is an ENFJ. This is extremely painful for me, as she criticizes me on my way of life, and believes I do not have a social life. She also believes that since I am still a teenager that my personality will change, which I do not plan on doing, unless it is ment to happen.

So my question is, will my personality type change, or will I have the same one (INTP obviously) that I have had since childhood?

Merci!,
Joaquin

 

[crippli]

You will change personality, maybe another personality, or within the one you have. Unless there is something traumatic, it will be so slow that you're not going to notice.

Remember that all INTPs are also different. Similarity is like a circle. It doesn't exist in nature.

Cheers
crippli

 

[Cosmic]

your personality will change over time. this is not to say that you personality type will change (which is also possible), but your brain is still developing, and you will continue to be shaped and defined by the intricate set of circumstances your life will encounter along with the choices that you make. if your personality changes, don't fight it. if it doesn't, don't try to change it. don't forget to treat yourself with respect and dignity, and part of that is allowing yourself to grow and mature. does your mother raise legitimate concerns? maybe try to interpret her criticism through an objective, constructive perspective? criticism can hurt, and it only makes it worse when people do it in a knit-picky, personal, pay-attention-to-the-wrong kind of manner, but just take a deep breath and remember that it's well-meaning. try not to fall for knee-jerk defenses when evaluating her criticism. . . try to take something out of it. and remember that, although we all have different personality types, we're all human. whatever guidance she's trying to convey, maybe she's doing it out of first-hand experiences and life lessons she's acquired. if after that, you still feel her criticism is completely misguided, well, try not to let it get you down. you are who you are. as for addressing this in an interpersonal manner. . . idk, man; i'm an INTP

 

[Melllvar]

So my question is, will my personality type change, or will I have the same one (INTP obviously) that I have had since childhood

According to the MBTI/Jung stuff, no, you're always one type, and if you think you changed then one or both of them was wrong. However people dispute the accuracy of that, and it's kind of irrelevant anyways since people often change a lot as they go through life, so it's not inconceivable you might feel differently about your type eventually.

Anyway, that type of thing with your mother doesn't seem particularly uncommon around here. I'm a good bit older and I still hear all that same kind of stuff from my family when I see them.

 

[sammael]

According to statistics there is a greater percentage of extraverts (in comparison to introverts) in the world, and society also tends to favour extraverts and their ways more so than the quieter and more independent introverts (this is also true of the Judging function). Because of this there is a tendency to discourage introverted behaviour and encourage extraverted behaviour. Introverts are commonly misunderstood, especially by extraverts who can have trouble understanding we like being alone, often might not have much to say, and often aren't particularly socially inclined. I doubt there is an introvert alive that hasn't encountered this in some way.

More than likely your mother genuinely thinks you would benefit and be happier with an active social life. Often extraverts seem to be of the opinion that the more people one knows and the more one interacts the better. This is often something we as introverts just have to deal with, although I know it can be hard especially in a situation like yours.

Although you can develop each of the dichotomies in MBTI and your personality can and will change, I don't believe (barring brain damage) that the preferences one has can change (i.e. personality Type will never change). But yeah, as Melllvar said it's kind of a grey area and time, experiences and different situations can have a drastic effect on a person and personality.

 

[Eucile]

I'd say it is common. I too am an introverted thinker who was/is surrounded by a largely extroverted feeling family. It's to be expected that your mother worries as society dictates it's "unnatural" or a sign of maladjustment for a child to prefer solitude and introspection to extroverted pursuits. As your mother I don't think she intends to be hurtful, but is concerned (given the misconception circulating about introversion). I agree with Cosmic and extend that maybe you should try to explain to her that your "lack of social life" is actually a result of your independence- your ability to find fulfillment within your own world without needing others to validate that fulfillment. That diving into a gregarious lifestyle will only serve the opposite effect. Or perhaps, if she's the stubborn sort, explanations will do no good and I am just being a typical INTP for suggesting that In any case, I think the healthiest thing for you to do is to hold strong to your own nature, and if that means your mother's disapproval then it's still a deal better than having to surrender what works for you.

 

[Auburn]

Similarity is like a circle. It doesn't exist in nature.

Cheers
crippli

Mmm, doesn't it?

It's impossible to change from male to female - though they share substantial similarities. (transgender operations don't get rid of your chromosomes in every cell of your body)

You will change personality, maybe another personality, or within the one you have. Unless there is something traumatic, it will be so slow that you're not going to notice.

Remember that all INTPs are also different.

I think the answer to whether personality type doesn't change over your lifetime depends on whether personality is a genetic factor (such as your gender, skin color, bone structure) or something that is constructed environmentally.

 

[crippli]

Mmm, doesn't it?

It's impossible to change from male to female - though they share substantial similarities. (transgender operations don't get rid of your chromosomes in every cell of your body)

I agree, not possible yet. If we use the common definition that a male is one who can produce sperm to fertilize an egg. And the other way to define a female. I do presume it will be possible later. Artificial fertilizing has come a long way. I think the chromosomes can be worked around. XY have both. XX is missing the Y. I'm not really sure how much of a hindrance that is if one do the change.

So I am still saying male will not be similar to another male or female, I claim that this is impossible. For similarity a comparison of the whole persons must be made. If there wasn't change, time would stand still.

I think the answer to whether personality type doesn't change over your lifetime depends on whether personality is a genetic factor (such as your gender, skin color, bone structure) or something that is constructed environmentally.

Genetics can also change, mutations. I don't know. But I suspect it's a bit of wishful thinking that personality type doesn't change. Also note that I wrote personality(some call it the soul). Personality type(but still a theory and generalization and unproved) I consider to be a part of what makes the personality.

 

[Sali]

Eh, I think your personality adjusts to what you need to do with it. Introversion and extroversion have merit (energy from others vs energy from being alone.) but the more I look into the cognitive functions themselves the more they just really seem like an estimation and a massive over simplification. who decided these were the functions? how did they figure it out? how do they know there aren't more? or that some of them aren't the same function or functions everyone has? why can't you use a lot of Te AND Fe depending on which is appropriate for the situation? I just think there are really far too many lose ends and assumptions to make it a very reliable or scientific system. It is a fun system I just think sometimes people take it far too seriously.

 

[FlyingSquid]

Ah, just got on to check and I saw all these answers. There is no way to change what my mother thinks, so I believe I will just have to be myself. Thanks for the information, it definitely helped me understand what may happen, and what will happen will happen.

Au revoir,
Joaquin

 

[crippli]

Glad to be off help.

Take care.
crippli

 

[C.J_Finn]

Everyone changes over time. You could end up being very different in about 10 years, but chances are you will be the same personality type for life. I first took the MBTI when I was 15 (three years ago), and in the time since then I've taken the test again once or twice every year or two and my result has been INTP every time. I'm different than I was back then in the sense that I'm slightly less introverted and I seem to have become more logical over the past few years as well.

 

[Auburn]

..but the more I look into the cognitive functions themselves the more they just really seem like an estimation and a massive over simplification. who decided these were the functions? how did they figure it out? how do they know there aren't more? or that some of them aren't the same function or functions everyone has? why can't you use a lot of Te AND Fe depending on which is appropriate for the situation? I just think there are really far too many lose ends and assumptions to make it a very reliable or scientific system. It is a fun system I just think sometimes people take it far too seriously.

Mhm.. "why" is a good thing to ask. Every assumption typology makes requires deeper investigation to confirm whether there is a realistic base for it. There are too many loose ends.

But, if you haven't yet seen this thread - http://intpforum.com/showthread.php?t=11573 - some people are attempting to explore the brain and see what truly are the functions that govern it.

 

[ObliviousGenius]

I'm not sure but my personality seems to be changing a little bit. I am a lot more extroverted than I use to be and I've gained a little more sensory traits. Even so, I am very much still an INTP and I have not lost any of the positive traits that come with being an INTP.

 

[Auburn]

I agree, not possible yet. If we use the common definition that a male is one who can produce sperm to fertilize an egg. And the other way to define a female. I do presume it will be possible later.

That would indeed be interesting.
I wonder what it'd be like to be female.. c.c

Genetics can also change, mutations.

Well perhaps, but a mutation would occur for the next generation, no? As far as you go, your genetics will stay the same during the course of your life - hence your personality, if indeed genetically defined, will remain the same. Genetic mutations that occur during the course of life (such as cancer) target a few cells, but don't themselves mutate the entire organism.

I don't know. But I suspect it's a bit of wishful thinking that personality type doesn't change. Also note that I wrote personality(some call it the soul). Personality type(but still a theory and generalization and unproved) I consider to be a part of what makes the personality.

I suppose this becomes a semantics thing. If we define Personality as being the totality of a persons specific Self (as shaped by their environment/experiences) then that does change with time and more experience, agreed. Though it is still up for debate whether a personality "type" is just one particular "state" of human existence, or an attribute of human biology.

 

[EditorOne]

FlyingSquid: A lot of us went through what you're going through, where parents or other authority figures regarded us as defective in some way and labored to change us. It gets tiresome. This forum is an oasis in a desert when that kind of pressure gets too intense.

Whether your type actually changes is open to discussion and questioning, as you have seen. However, you can learn to incorporate non-INTP traits and even skill sets in your day to day existence, mainly to make life easier for other people. It only makes your life more interesting to try to figure out an appropriate emotion for a given happening, for example.

Sometimes it is helpful to you to give off just enough of what other people expect to see as "normal" in order to avoid being thought of as unduly abnormal, as attention-getting weird. It allows things to move forward without fighting a battle all the time. You won't fool people who really know you, of course, but for school, the workplace, etc., you can fit in better and experience less static around your message; you can blend into the background rather than standing out as an objet d'art from an unknown school of endeavor that everyone looks at and comments on. Eek.

Don't rush it and don't make it a goal, as someone already sort of said. Trying on aspects of other types is like trying on clothing you know isn't going to be a good fit.

I don't think you're violating yourself or any key principles by exploring this kind of stuff. I think you learn more about yourself every time you do it.

 

[ObliviousGenius]

Whether your type actually changes is open to discussion and questioning, as you have seen. However, you can learn to incorporate non-INTP traits and even skill sets in your day to day existence, mainly to make life easier for other people. It only makes your life more interesting to try to figure out an appropriate emotion for a given happening, for example.

Sometimes it is helpful to you to give off just enough of what other people expect to see as "normal" in order to avoid being thought of as unduly abnormal, as attention-getting weird. It allows things to move forward without fighting a battle all the time. You won't fool people who really know you, of course, but for school, the workplace, etc., you can fit in better and experience less static around your message; you can blend into the background rather than standing out as an objet d'art from an unknown school of endeavor that everyone looks at and comments on. Eek.

Don't rush it and don't make it a goal, as someone already sort of said. Trying on aspects of other types is like trying on clothing you know isn't going to be a good fit.

I don't think you're violating yourself or any key principles by exploring this kind of stuff. I think you learn more about yourself every time you do it.

I agree. I need to fit-in in different areas so I like to keep everything separate. School is school, work is work, church is church, and I'm a different person in each area. I lean on my chameleon for survival. I could still be considered eccentric but not enough to be completely isolated from social life.

@OP You have to learn enough so that extraverts identify you as just "different" and not weird. People will respect you more if you conform a little bit.
It's a hassle sometimes but it's also pretty cool. Just continue to be yourself and you, along with the people around you, will evolve.

 

[FlyingSquid]

I actually fit in fine at school, and that is far from the problem. I actually do try to go outside my comfort zone personality wise, but it becomes very stressful. A lot of what EditorOne said was what was the most successful to me.

Dos Vedanya,
Joaquin

 

[EyeSeeCold]

Personality type =/= personality

You get that impression from MBTI, but Jung proposed typology as a theory of psychological orientations, not personality traits. Interestingly, he did state that "type is nothing static, it changes with the course of life"(Interview with Carl Jung 8:56), however, psychological types could not be possible if there was no structure to hold them in place, to provide discreteness.

At the most, types oscillate, if not stay the same. But to answer the thread, no, personalities develop as you grow older and engage in different environments.

 

[Reluctantly]

Personality type =/= personality

You get that impression from MBTI, but Jung proposed typology as a theory of psychological orientations, not personality traits. Interestingly, he did state that "type is nothing static, it changes with the course of life"(Interview with Carl Jung 8:56), however, psychological types could not be possible if there was no structure to hold them in place, to provide discreteness.

At the most, types oscillate, if not stay the same. But to answer the thread, no, personalities develop as you grow older and engage in different environments.

Exactly.
A personality type exists in everyone.
But our personality will change and grow within that personality type, even masking it if we will it to happen. It's like learning to go against instincts though. How healthy that will be depends of course. The idea is to reach a point in life where you can embrace your cognitive instincts, I believe (at least this makes sense to me).

 

[Essence]

Your personality is made up of alot of things. Memories are a key part of it and they're constantly being made and referred to. So a person is constantly changing just by living their lives. If something traumatic were to happen, your personality would change.

Now i don't know if being whatever personality type you are is affected by the network of neurons in your brain, but i don't see any other way that being Ti Ne Si Fe INTP wouldn't be able to change.

 

[Reluctantly]

Your personality is made up of alot of things. Memories are a key part of it and they're constantly being made and referred to. So a person is constantly changing just by living their lives. If something traumatic were to happen, your personality would change.

Now i don't know if being whatever personality type you are is affected by the network of neurons in your brain, but i don't see any other way that being Ti Ne Si Fe INTP wouldn't be able to change.

To be honest with you, I doubt it's that simple. We all have certain aspects about us that will confine us to certain types for whatever reasons. It depends on how you define correlation related to causation and how well thought out you do that in creating types. It comes down to the old argument of archetype versus just learned behavior, and whether learned behavior should become a placeholder of a person's true cognition should it become so strong.

So in actuality, as you might be arguing, it's not that simple because genes don't imply causation. One starts to ask philosophical questions then, such as "if I feel pain, but ignore it, am I in pain?" In terms of physiology, yes, you would be. In terms of free will, no you wouldn't be, but that doesn't mean you won't have to exert extra energy, effort, and time to ignore that pain. In other words, personality is different than personality type, whereas a person's personality type is akin to real learning about oneself's physiology through experience.

To put it more succinctly, it's the difference between understanding your personal qualia as it pertains to different aspects and functioning of the world versus behavioral conditioning. It's not just about knowing the difference between a duck and say a human, but understanding a concrete difference between the functioning of two human beings or any same species animal.

But I agree wholeheartedly with you that great changes in physiology could change a person's personality type, as well as personality; trauma would definitely lead to one type of structural change. But I think it's important to not mistake the genetic structures that make us up with the processes that go with functioning as a live being; because there is still a structure for those processes to be based on. I've always thought the same thing with physics, in general, as well. There are always containers that allow processes to take place; I don't think it would be possible to have one without the other (maybe that would make an interesting thread?).

 

[Otherside]

The first few times I took the test, INTJ was my outcome. Later in my life I had a lot of problems with holding a job (I'm ADD also), and eventually my life crashed completely when I suffered a few psychotic episodes. My J/P was borderline anyway in the beginning, but now I test almost entirely "P".

The other three haven't changed much.

 

[Melkor]

No, I change over every few days. Although sometimes I can do a few in one day with the help of a few bottled chemicals.

Fixed personalities are for Squares.

 

[MizKodomo]

I'm on the edge of being an ISTP- I tend to learn faster and more efficiently when I work with my hands *shrugs*

 

[Sanctum]

I think our experiences are what changes our personality kind of a way to adapt to society. Me for example when i was younger i was extroverted always the center of attention, cocky, etc. Then i accidentally started a fire in the house with fireworks after that i began to get negative attention. That in addition to a series of unfortunate event i began to thing about life and why things happen and think about how i could change things and that's when the introversion came along with the thinking

 

[Otherside]

I think our experiences are what changes our personality kind of a way to adapt to society. Me for example when i was younger i was extroverted always the center of attention, cocky, etc. Then i accidentally started a fire in the house with fireworks after that i began to get negative attention. That in addition to a series of unfortunate event i began to thing about life and why things happen and think about how i could change things and that's when the introversion came along with the thinking

When I was ten or so, I had a "roman candle" that was leftover from July 4. I had no way to light it other than the stove, but I was certain that I could make it out the kitchen door before the fuse ignited it.

Wrong!

I made it halfway to the door and it started spewing sparks everywhere. I retreated back to the sink which was next to the stove, and doused it with water, thus extinguishing it.

No fire was ignited, but the sparks melted hundreds of holes in the nylon curtains, and did a little damage to the countertop.

My mom was at work, but when my Grandmother (a saint) came over to check up on me, she saw what happened and took me to the nearest town to find some replacement curtains (as if my mom wouldn't notice that there were new curtains in the kitchen).

It wasn't a life changing experience, and it's one of those stories that we laugh about now.

Thought I'd let you know that you aren't the only one to have a fireworks mishap in your house as a kid, although yours may have been a bit more serious in effect than mine.

 

[Architect]

Your MBTI type is known as your 'Temperament type', not 'Personality type' generally. Temperament is like your hardwired programming, personality like your software which developed in your life.

Your basic type isn't going to change (INTP), but your personality (software) will as you develop. Actually what will happen at midlife is that you will become more like and closer to your hardware (INTP) then ever before. Youth is about outward growth, midlife is about inner. Jung had a lot to say about this and he was right.

The basic type is constant, but how it is expressed through the personality changes.

 

[Otherside]

Your MBTI type is known as your 'Temperament type', not 'Personality type' generally. Temperament is like your hardwired programming, personality like your software which developed in your life.

Your basic type isn't going to change (INTP), but your personality (software) will as you develop. Actually what will happen at midlife is that you will become more like and closer to your hardware (INTP) then ever before. Youth is about outward growth, midlife is about inner. Jung had a lot to say about this and he was right.

The basic type is constant, but how it is expressed through the personality changes.

I agree with everything you've said.